Realz

French Open 2010: Le troisieme jour

In French Open, Grand Slam, Jo-Wilfred Tsonga, Maria Sharapova, Rafael Nadal, Roger Federer, Serena Williams, Sports Blog, Tennis, Uncategorized, Venus Williams on May 26, 2010 at 9:00 am

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Bonjour! Bonjour! Bonjour! I hope that all is well with my readers. Today, the 4th day of the championships begins and so does second round action. All second round matches have been decided with the exception of one men’s first round match. Xavier Malisse of Belgium leads Simon Gruel of Germany. Malisse has a two set lead and they are tied one game apiece in the third set. However, today is a brand new day and Malisse’s lead is no guarantee of his eventual win. Today, it seems I have nothing to “hate” about. Hmmmm, never a good thing but I am sure before the end of this issue I would come up with something. I do have some regrettable news though. There will not be a full issue tomorrow. I do sincerely apologize. I simply have too much to do and may not be able to complete all the necessary steps in order to get the issue to publication. I will as always send out an update. Friday’s issue of course will be jam packed. I am again making a plea that readers post comments on the Blog. Even if you cannot make comments immediately, you can do so at a later time, granted that later is not several years from now. Anyway, as there is nothing else by way of housekeeping that I can think of, we commence with the tennis.

Women’s Draw
The women’s action saw four-time champion No Justice Justine take the court against Tsevtana Pironkova. Now the name Tsevtana Pironkova may not be familiar to many of you but for the remainder, this name is infamous. In 2004, the Bulgarian took out the Crackhead in the first round of the Australian Open, a major upset to say the least. I was therefore expecting to see a similar result against the Belgian. However, my dream of another upset was to be denied though hopefully deferred. NJJ took the match 6-4 6-3. Things were not all smooth for the Belgian cheat as Pironkova was hitting some good ball. Nonetheless NJJ is into the second round and 6 matches shy of taking back her crown.

WOW We can actually see boobs on the Belgian cheat…or is it just the wind blowing up under the shirt.

Marian Bartoli of France aka La petite grosse got through to the second round as did Vera Zvonereva, Daniella Hantucova, Wickmayer of Belgium (2009 US Open semi-finalist), Jie Zheng (2010 Australian Open semi-finalist), Israeli Shahar Peer and Shriekapova. They all made it through to the second round. Americans Jill Craybas and Betthanie Mattek-Sands also got through with Sands taking out fellow American Vania King (we often refer to King as that tricycle riding villain in Saw).

Look now Maria, we spoke about this outfit last year…

and you come back this year in a similar shite…Seriously WTF?? Who is your stylist?? I really hope you aren’t eating meals with them.

There was not much news on the women’s side unless you overlook the fact that last year’s finalist Dinara Safina aka Dinada Safina got schooled by her mama. Some critics felt that amidst a stretch of bad play and injury, Marat Safin’s kid sister would find her game here on the grounds of Roland Garros and to be honest, this was a perfect opportunity for the Russian. The 24-year-old was playing 39-year-old Kimiko Date (Da-té not date) Krumm (apparently she is married to German race car driver Michael Krumm. Never heard of him) Ms. Krumm originally from Japan took a 12 year absence from the game. She is so old that when she played her first French Open, Dinada was only 3 years old. At first it looked that fortune was favoring the young as Dinada won the first set 6-3. However, there is an expression which says “new brooms sweep well but the old ones knows the corners” And yesterday Date-Krumm was showing some ole school tricks taking the entire match 3-6 6-4 7-5. Now Dinada is out. She is going to drop out of the top ten as she has not come anywhere near as close as her stellar season last year when she made it to two majors finals and collecting tour titles as if there were available at a yard sale. Now she will be losing all those points and come Wimbledon, she is sure to be floating around the 15-20 ranking.

Whhhhhyyyyyyy?? I'm losing to an old lady WTF??

Date-Krumm…lil upstart taught she was going to school mama but like a good mama, I sure did give her a spanking

Anyways in other news, Venus and Serena Williams are trying to be number ranked in both doubles and singles this French Open. So they begin their effort to do so with a win in first round doubles 6-0 6-1. They played a team one half of which was Tamarine Tanasugurn. Now Tanasugurn from Thailand played two matches yesterday in both singles and doubles, four sets of tennis and only won three games. Yes 3, the number between 2 and 4. She lost 6-1 6-1 to Daniella Hantucova and despite getting some help in doubles only won one game. Talk about a tough day at the office.

Crackhead: Yeah gurl, I didn’t want to say anything earlier but yeah…your head a HOT MESS….

Anyway sticking on the subject of the Williams. People are still talking about the Crackhead’s dress in particular the nude color underpants. Many are claiming that it is classless, slutty, etc etc. I mean seriously, I don’t understand what’s the deal. First off she has been wearing this color undies all year long including at the Australian Open where she debut that yellow outfit that appeared to have a very low cut bosom. Now the woman is wearing underwear, the color does not matter. If she was trying to go GI Jane out there a la Lindsay Lohan, we would be having something to talk about but come on people, let’s focus on the bigger picture. Venus is actually being more aggressive and controversial where as usually it is more so the Serenanator who is the bull dog. Rumor has it that the Crackhead is staying in Serena’s Parisian villa and Serena gave the Crackhead the bigger room. Hmmmm is Serena actually acquiescing to her rightful place of kid sister. Let’s see. I am going to more so believe that the Serenanator figures if she keeps the Crackhead happy, she won’t be trying to pilfer her good stuff in her apartment. You know how them crackheads can be. Can’t trust them.

Venus down under in January 2010….Now you see the undies…

Now you don’t. ILLUSION IN YO FACE

Anyways the men.
I am guessing that since first round action at the French Open is over the span on three days, it sort of spreads out the drama because yesterday on the men’s side, it was business as usual, albeit at times some of the business was risky. Mr. Brooklyn Decker began his futile attempt to win a French title yesterday against Jarrko Niemenen of Finland. Mind you he had not played a single clay court match for the year but somehow he came on court brimming with confidence. He took the first set 6-2 but things quickly began to deteriorate for the American as he lost the next two sets and was two points away from losing. However, he climbed his way back out and improved to an 8-8 record at the French Open. Congratulations Mr. Brooklyn Decker, you have just moved from mediocrity to average. His compatriot Robby Ginepri also made it through to the second round, as he took out fellow American Sam “the Grinch” Querry who was playing some really good clay court tennis this season winning a title in Europe this season.

Overwhelming favorite Divadal put on a tennis clinic as he took apart French wild card Gianni Mina 6-2 6-2 6-2. One can only appreciate the fact that Divadal’s generosity as he has taken apart much more formidable opponents losing far less games.

Ahhh excuse me Divadal….

You’re wearing Serenanator’s outfit…(look at those fabulous arches in the eyebrows for the Diva)

Gianni Mina was lamb for the slaughter up against the Divadal.

Dividal being the flag ship of the Spanish Armada also saw fellow Spaniards Tabasco Verdasco, David Ferrer and Juan Carlos Ferrero go through to the second round. Austria’s Jurgen Melzer took out Dudi Sela of Isreal in straight sets. Lleyton “Dingo Dog” Hewitt of Australia also won his match though he too, like Mr. Brooklyn Decker, is on a losing effort to hoist the French Open cup.

Dingo Dog extending tremendous effort, which would be better spent elsewhere.

Anyway nothing much else to report though just far in terms of Day 4 play, the Crackhead has made it through to the 4th round 6-2 6-4 (a really neat match from the American) as did “Hood” who basically came out for a warm up session against American Taylor Dent 6-0 6-1 6-1. Nadia “Fatrova” Petrova also won as did Albert Montanes who beat Mr. Federer in Portugal this year also won. Mr. Federer is in action right now and though right now he is on serve, he is looking very very very sloppy. He finally took the first set in a tie-break.

RTFN Picture Show…
Hottie of the Day…well today for the woman, is merely a cutie…

Carolina Woziniacki of Denmark…the Danish butter cookie….

On the men’s side… possible VIEWERS DISCRETION ADVISED…
Fernando “Tabasco” Verdasco

Nottie of the Day…

Tabasco Verdasco getting ready for the match…..we here at RTFN has declared this man so hot, he is not a natural disaster….VOLCANO HOT…

Ana Ivanovic, you better watch your back because you might just get cut.

Notties of the Day…

They appeared on the tennis courts to play a match but...

but the jury is still out as to their gender…

Not much going on in the Mixed Bag today…

Ever the model of class and sophistication, Tabasco Verdasco showing off 4th position ballet. Spanish Baryshnikov

Talk about mega hold hair gel..this is through 5 sets of tennis…

These ladies definitely need a Mani.. (This is Jie Zheng. To think she is Asian and this is the state of her nails. Appalling)

And seeing that they are tennis players…Pedi for sure. Just disgusting.

What does Iron Man do in his off days?

He plays tennis for France under the name of David Guez

So I have figured out how it is that Dinada lost to a mommy…Because she is with child.

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