Realz

A very dramatic Day 3 at the Aussie Open 2011

In Andy Roddick, Australian Open, Caroline Wozniacki, Mardy Fish, Maria Sharapova, Nicolas Mahut, Novak Djokovic, Roger Federer, Tennis, Tsvetana Pironkova, Venus Williams, Victoria Azarenka on January 19, 2011 at 8:26 am

So Day 3 is on its way as I write this entry and of course there is drama and of course Russ Troll Doll Venus Williams is at the center of it. After being up 4-1, she seemed to have lost her way or her mind, which might be closer to the truth. She is playing some unknown player of course, Sandra Zahlavova of the Czech Republic ranked in the 90’s if I am not mistaken. Just checked, she is ranked 97 in the world. Russ Troll was dropping the ball short in the court having this lil Czech Minx believe that she can beat her and of course Russ Troll is giving her reasons to feel that way. She was making all sorts of mistakes on court, the most egregious being that bloody outfit she has on. I have seen some ugly madness on the tennis court in my years, but I think Russ Troll just completed the grand slam of bad outfit. WTF?? But anyhow I am not dealing with that right now. I know all the pundits were going on about how well RT looked in the first round but I knew that her play was sloppy and that she needed to work on things. So said, so done. She was all over the place but it turned out that it might have been an on coming injury as she might have pulled her groin muscle. I thought she might have broken her vagina with that blood curdling scream she let out while grabbing her nether region down set point. She hobbled off court to be treated after losing that first set 6-7. However, she came back playing gingerly at first but that lil Czech Minx finally realized who she was playing and got shut out in the 2nd set 6-0. As I write this, they are battling it out in the 3rd.

Ooooo Noooooooo. The cat is about to come out of the bag

Go back in...Get back in there you bad kitty kat

I know I hate on RT a lot but you know, I am a lifetime fan and I have stuck with RT through everything; the ups and the many many downs. However, I have to give her major credit here today. I kept my composure throughout the match in case you were wondering and my blood pressure stayed at the normal level. Anyway, despite the injury, RT is back on court battling. She is giving it her all, meanwhile you had Janko Tipsarevic of Serbia literally throwing the match to Tabasco Verdasco of Spain who was so on his way out of the tournament being down two sets to none and with the Serb serving for the match. It was crazy. The Serb literally refused to give any effort whatsoever. I mean here is RT with a broken vejayjay and she is on court playing and giving it her all meanwhile Janko is tanking the match because he lost match point because of his own follies. I hopes the ATP and the ITF fine that fool. He had that match on his racquet and I am talking about an easy easy easy shot, Stevie Wonder would have clocked that for a winner. However, homeboy was trying to be cute or something or perhaps show up Tabasco he got hoisted by his own petard and lost the point and apparently with it, the desire to play. Tanko lost the 4th set tiebreaker 0-7 and lost the 5th set 0-6. Totally inappropriate for this high level arena.

Trying to be cute at the net left this Serb with an ugly lost

Anyway, RT and Czech Minx are even 2-2 in the third. Hopefully RT can pull this one out of the bag. She is the lone American female left in the singles draw. Vania King got blown out by the Danish Biscuit 6-0 6-1. RT is now serving for the match…hold on to your seats people…we in for more DRAMA. 15-0 Venus…15-15..bad approach shot from RT with a winner from CM. 2nd serve…pressure…15-30. 2nd serve…more pressure..30-30…two points from the match again. 40-30 match point…no wait CM is challenging the serve and it was long…2nd serve 30-30….easy second serve from Venus…40-30….match point again….2nd serve again for match….wait for it…wait for it…you know its RT so a double fault is coming. So said, so done. Double fault!…The crowd is screaming for CM…Can you believe these bloody Australians? Deuce…another challenge from CM…..and the Czech Minx loses the challenge and has no more remaining for the match …Another match point for Venus…..and she did it with a body serve….Venus Williams showing great great resolve and a possible broken vejayjay has made it through to the 3rd round. 6-7 6-0 6-4. WOW I thought it was going to be 2009 again when she lost in the 2nd round to Lady Hobbit of Spain who is set to play Mommie Dearest in the 2nd round. Venus Williams, you are the Star Player of the Day! You did a great job and I am really proud to be one of your fanz. But do know that I would be hating on you when needs be. Just know that I hate on you with love. BTW You better get your game together for the rest of the tournament.

Have to give the Czech Minx some props though not a lot.

Anyway in other newz…Cheating Justine made quick work of her British opponent Elena Baltacha 6-1 6-3 and would join Victoria Azarenka, Dominika Cibulkova who use to go out with Beetlejuice (I speak the honest truth I got pictures to prove it too.) Maria Shriekapova who had yet another erratic match, Na Li/Li Na, Francesca Schiabone who also scraped through yet another match, Boynetsova and Andrea Petkovic are all also through to the 3rd round. Petkovic will face RT in the next round. Petkovic is a tough customer so RT better get her act together. As I write, watching Mr. Federer making uncharacteristic errors on court against the Frenchman Gilles Simon who apparently has a 2-0 record against Mr. Federer. Mr. Federer was two sets but kept donating his serve to Simon in the 3rd set eventually gift wrapping the set 4-6 to Simon.

Does he think he is in the Matrix or something?

They are now battling in the 4th set. It’s that bloody high flying backhand that is killing him following it up with some crazy forehand efforts. He looks like a completely different player in this match. I tell you, Day 3 at the Aussie Open is all about the drama. Anyway back to the ladies. Several other women made it to the third round but we not going to mention them because you don’t know them. However, I have to mention the losers, Marian Bartoli, the 15th seed aka La Petite Grosse who bad beat her 1st round opponent is out of the tournament (apparently she also got injured) as are Yanina Wickmayer, the 21st seed, Tsetvana Pironkova, the 32nd seed and Kaia Kanepi, the 20th seed. So things are shaping up on the top half of the women’s draw. Look for match ups such as Boynetsova vs. Cheating Henin who enjoys a 16-2 record against the Russia and RT match against Petkovic when they play 3rd round matches on Friday.

Why won't you just DIE ALREADY and let Mr. Federer through to the 3rd round

On the men’s side, it seems that the top men are struggling as D’Joker had a tough time against his opponent as he barely won the first set and lost the second. However, he reasserted himself thereafter and completely dominated the match. The same cannot be said of Mr. Federer at this point who is struggling with routine shots. They are all tied 4-4 in the 4th set. Everything is off and he cannot win a cheap point for nothing. He is down 0-40 at this point. 15-40. 30-40. Mr. Federer is making it look like work out here people. BLOODY HELL…Broken 4-5. Simon will serve to take the match into a 5th set. Mr. Federer is just all sorts of hot Swiss mess out here.

WOW is this Francesco Schiabone looking all lady like in pink? Miracles can happen. WOW. HUGE E for EFFORT

Anyway, Mr. Decker won his match comfortably today. Some might say he looked impressive but his conservative style of play is not going to get it done against the top players at all……15-0 Simon as he serves for the 4th set. 30-30. Let’s see what Mr. Federer can do here. 40-30 set point for Simon as Mr. Federer sprayed the forehand yet again. Deuce….my heart rate just went up threefold. Okay….back to other men’s matches. Beetlejuice just pulled out his match in the 4th set as well. Break point Mr. Federer. Deuce. Lurch aka Tomas Berdych won his match and is through to the 3rd round. He is looking impressive this tournament. Set point again for Simon. And we go to a 5th set.

WTF is going on in your mind??? Get it together

BLOODY HELL Mr. Federer, you were up 2 sets to love. WTF man?? Are you bloody serious with his crap!!! I cannot deal with this madness. Ljubicic won as did Wawrinka of Switzerland, Tommy Robredo who took out American Mardy former Whale, the 16th seed, who was very out of sorts on court (he has a thyroid infection it was later reported), Malisse took out Spaniard Montanes the 25th seed, Almagro of Spain also won as did Richard Gasquet of France.  Juan Monaco the 26th seed lost as did recent celeb Nicolas Mahut. Love 30 on Mr. Federer’s serve so you know he is getting broken in the 5th set. 15-30 now. Anyway, not much else to report. I swore this was going to be an easy morning. Now, Mr. Federer is trying to give me fever. 30-30 with an ace. Mr. Federer won the game and broke Simon to go up 4-2 in the 5th. Now he has 2 game points to go up 5-2. Fever… I have scarlet fever! 40-30 with a winner from Simon….Mr. Federer, you are killing me here……5-2 YES! Simon to serve to stay in the match now….

Yes...let's get this show on the road

Anyways triple match point Mr. Federer……15-40, Simon saved one. Saved two. 30-40. Deuce. Why is Mr. Federer staying so far behind the baseline? I have no idea…He better get things done now! 5-3 Mr. Federer to serve for the match. 15-0 Mr. Federer. 15-15. WTF with that stupid error?? 30-15 Mr. Federer. Two points from the match. 30-30. Mr. Federer again staying way behind the baseline instead of dictating play from inside the court. 40-30, Match point #4. Deuce….stupid drop shot landed on his side of the net. On BLOODY MATCH POINT YOU TRYING TO BE CUTE MR. FEDERER?? …WHY WON’T SIMON DIE ALREADY??? Match point #5 for Mr. Federer. Brilliant volley on second serve……MATCH MR. FEDERER OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Mr. Federer got it done 6-2 6-3 4-6 4-6 6-3. Mr. Federer needs to go back to the practice court and bloody Anacone better get that backhand together cause he not winning shit with that style of play.

That was a relief.....

Anyway not much else to report. RT was very mum about her injury saying that she had to keep herself together and you know Mr. Federer realizing that he got really lucky. I have to admit that towards the very end, he stuck to his game plan and the backhand was back on point. However, he needs that to be consistent. Meanwhile I have to say that Mr. Decker and his coach, Larry Stefanky are employing a losing strategy with having Mr. Decker go for slice/splice backhands instead of flattening out his backhands. That is only going to kill him in the later rounds. They really need to come up with a different something.  Anyway there is a very interesting ladies match up set for Day 4 at the Aussie Open between Bojana Jovanovski and Vera Zvonareva the 2nd seed. Don’t be surprise if there is an upset. That’s my match to watch tomorrow. …

BIG PICTURE SHOW..

NOTTIES

WOW Didn't think it were possible that he could uglier

The only illusion here is that she is delusional thinking that this hot mess with a scope of garbage looks good.

SERIOUSLY Vee?? You get a Grade Z

 

Now he is usually in the hottie section and there have been reports that he looks like another famous athlete

None other than Cristiano Rinaldo

But go back up to the Tabasco pic...Don't he look like Donkey Kong (Forgive me God. I might burn in hell for that one)

And while we are on the subject Ronaldo....Check he out, You can call it a European man purse/carry all/murse, all you want...but in the US of A, you are walking around with a bloody ladies' clutch. WTF?? WTMFFF??? However, I can't hate. You definitely working it and I am feeling the belt for sure!

Let me hear another man say, they can't find a beautiful girl again....However, rumour has it that Beetlejuice is swinging a huge racquet. You go Cibulkova! Tell them length matters to you and not just girth. And if I were you Dominika, there are some fanz who might just want to cut you. So watch your back, these itches be going wild for your man.

See what I am talking about gurl... these itches are FIERCE!! They would steal your man.

They even starting a riot for the man.....WTF? Look at granny trying to get her some. You go gurl...lady...ehhh.. granny. Granny say to tell you young itches to back up cause she got her A game. She post-menopausal and that means no PMS and no baby mama drama. You better hide your menz!

I think the whale might have just been harpooned

A lil girl-girl action

I got my eyes on you people... I better start seeing more comments and subscriptions to the site. http://www.realztenisfanz.wordpress.com

 

 

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  1. entertaining…but dont call Venus a Troll…u fas n outta order…but the outfit was HORRENDOUS…She probably was in pain after catching a glimpse of herself on the jumbo-tron..that catastrophy is enough to make anyone cringe. But great fight from her!

    • LOL…WOW and you want to call me a hater. Yeah that outtafit is the absolute worse I have seen. She looked out of shape in it. The thing looks like a sewing machine vomited it out. And she does look like a Russ Troll doll. That head is WAY OUT OF ORDER NOW… Gurl you have made 27.6 million playing tennis on the court alone…and you going to Bobby’s to buy your weave. Now that’s code violation right there.

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