Realz

Live at the US Open 2011 Day 6

In Agnes Radwanska, Alexander Dolgopolov, Andrea Petkovic, Caroline Wozniacki, Fernando Verdasco, Flavia Pennetta, Francesca Schiavone, Jo-Wilfried Tsonga, Juan Monaco, Mardy Fish, Novak Djokovic, Roger Federer, Sam Stosur, Serena Williams, Svetlana Kuznetsova, Tommy Haas, US Open, Victoria Azarenka on September 4, 2011 at 8:18 am

Now as much I love tennis, I sorta avoid going to the US Open. The reason being that in the past when I have gone, I was more or less surrounded by idiots. I mean it is amazing how much people go to these events and no next to nothing about the sport. I am not going to knock ignorance because I mean, you are going to the event to learn something. However, my problem is that these idiots are constantly airing their stupidity and they never shut up. Often times, they are arguing points despite facts to the contrary. Anyway, I got a “hookup” and got the chance to purchase a ticket to see Saturday matches ie see Mr. Federer and the Serenanator live. I was not going to pass that up for nothing. I do thank my friend for thinking of me at that critical time when the ticket offer came up. I do appreciate it.

Flushing Meadows here I come

So anyway, I set out on Saturday for Flushing Meadows and everything seem to be working for me. I got in and out of the barber, the bus driver was very nice and stopped for me after seeing me running to get to the bus stop. She did not have to at all as stopped before the bus stop. The trains were there when I got to the stations and by 12:45, I was all ready for Mr. Federer vs. Marin Cilic.

When I left home, Danish Biscuit was dealing with Saw Clown aka Vania King, Tipsarevic had won the first set from Berdych and Francesco Schiabone was down a set. Navarro aka Lady Hobbit was bad beating her countrywoman. By the time I got to Queens, Danish Biscuit crushed King, Berdych retired from the match, Scheepers tried to serve for the match against Schiabone only to be broken and lost the tie-breaker to head to a 3rd set and Navarro was through to the Round of 16. Anyway, I asked the ticket attendant where to go and she said two levels up. Now I imagined that I had most wonderful seats and will be almost court side. However, when I found my spot, I was struggling for oxygen as you very well know that higher altitude causes oxygen deprivation. I was at the very top of the stadium. I could see Manhattan from my seat. Not only was I looking hot but I was feeling hot too with the sun blazing down on me.

My seat

My view from my seat

Anyway, I was still able to see the court and soon enough Mr. Federer came out in his fire engine red along with Marin Cilic. Mr. Federer was not stellar but he was playing well enough because Cilic was clearly overwhelmed by the occasion and despite playing exceptionally well in his first two rounds, he came up short in the end. Mr. Federer’s backhand was the obvious liability on court as it landing consistently in the service box and bouncing up high. I know it will be snack time when he faces more tougher opponents like a Tsonga, D’Joker, Divadal or a Lochness, if he gets that round. Mr. Federer is not guaranteed in the finals of majors anymore with his piss poor play as of late. Anyway, I felt the stadium after the first 3 sets, Mr. Federer being up 2-1 and had a break in the 4th already. I wanted to see other players.

Mr. Federer vs Cilic

By this time, Anastasia Pavlyuchenkova took out Fivehead Jankovic in straight sets and Mardy Fish and Kevin Anderson were on their way in their match. Schiabone had also made another comeback and took the match. So I wandered around the grounds and by this time, Mr. Federer finished off Cilic 6-3 4-6 6-4 6-2.

On my way to see others whilst keeping check of the score on Ashe

I saw Jurgen Meltzer (aka Jurgen Meltdown) of Austria and his doubles partner Philipp Petzschner of Germany

Yearning for Jurgen

Guten Tag!!!

Saw Peng Shuai practicing...she's up against Flavia Pennetta

I even spied Sam D'Stove Stosur out on the practice courts

Caught a lil of the Hantuchova and Radwanska's doubles match...They won after a poor first set

Then I saw this... Fabio Fognini... I really need to work on my Italian

He was practicing with his doubles partner Simone Bolelli but he didn't have his shirt off so...

I went back to watching him... the pictures do not do him justice at all

I saw Alexandr Dolgopolov....the boy who looks like a girl who looks like a boy. I am really impressed with his cool calm demeanor on court. And in person he's not bad looking at all if you ignore the acne. He's always fixing his hair though

He was playing Ivo Karlovic

Ivo, why are your socks dirty?? The clay season is long over and those sucks are dirty.

Aravane Rezai has a phat ass not going to lie

Heineken may have been light but his breath was heavy. Can someone tell me why I was smelling this man's breath even though he never spoke to me and I was behind him all the time. A wind was howling with his halitosis. People do not go to public events if you know you are carrying toxic waste in your mouth.

The Serenanator

While I was wondering about, I checked the score and realized that I had to hurry because the Serenanator was destroying Victoria Azarenka on court. she was already up 4-0. I raced back to my seat….I mean I climb the slopes to get to my seat by which time, the Serenanator was up 5-0. Victoria won a game and Serena closed out the set 6-1. The beginning of the second set was no different from the first and the Serenanator looked poised to put the Serena Sleeper hold on Victoria. The Serenanator failed to convert a chance to go up 2 breaks but had triple match points on Azarenka’s serve but failed to convert any of them.

Victoria Azarenka out wandering wondering where her game has gone

Triple match points

Azarenka sensing a loose moment from the American, seized that moment to break the Serenanator when she served for the match. Things were getting interesting for a few minutes prior Serena was up 5-3 love-40 and now it was 6-5 Azarenka. My throat was dry and I could not deal with the drama. I was definitely vocally rooting for the Serenanator and if she were to loose, it was a long way to the exit. I could not do the “Walk of Shame.” May I could just jump down. That canopy below look like it could take my weight. Right?

WTF Serena?? WTMFF??

Anyway, fortunately, the Serenanator got herself together and took the set to a tiebreaker, which was again tense to say the least for me. 7-5, Serenanator and with that, the match 6-1 7-6; the No 4 seed was out. It is really a crying shame because Victoria Azarenka is a really good player and when she is on form, she is always meeting up the Serenanator a la 2009, 2010 Australian Open and now 2011 US Open. She is one of my hopefuls to win a major because she is really good. I hope she takes this losses and build from it. Anyway, I have to say that the Serenanator is playing really really tough. She is very tactical and is not allowing herself to get behind any opponent. She is psyching out her opponents and right about now, they are all scared.

The Serenanator is splitting the competition

Goodness gracious....that was a close one

The Serenanator giving her winner's on court interview. Mary-Jo Fernandez, those slingbacks is high inappropriate at this international event. They look like your house slippers and I am not even going to comment on your nurse's scrub skirt because I think you already know you get zero style points for that.

You know I was extremely happy with the win so I raced down as close I could to the court (Thank God for the gym!)and took more pictures. I even saw Mary-Jo Fernandez doing the on-court interview.

On my way out of the stadium I saw Richard Williams…

Yeah, my daughter is kicking @$$

Anyway, I went over to Louis Armstrong Stadium to see two men battle it out for a place in the Ladies 4th Round. Kuzi-Rex and Akgul A-man-mu-ra-do-va who looks every bit as a boy as she does on TV. She looks like she can also snuff you out like a candle in the wind. Lynn Welch was the chair umpire for the match (For super die hard fanz like moiself who knows the chair umpires by name.)

Kuzi Rex. Not even going to talk about what she's wearing

Perhaps a bit pre-historic?

Akgul Amanmuradova

By the time, Dolgopolova aka the Boy who looks like a Girl who looks like a boy had taken out Ivo Karlovic and Juan Carlos Ferrero also won when his compatriot and opponent retired from the match. Mardy Fish had also taken care of Kevin Anderson who was putting up a late charge. Anyway, I checked the schedule on my smart phone which was so much more economical than buying a programme for ($20…get the hell outta here USTA. Do you know what I can get for $20 in the real world?) Anywho, I decided to go see some real menz action on Grandstand because it was going to be a Harem of Hotties as Argentina’s Juan Monaco was currently playing Germany’s Tommy Haas and after that “piece de resistance” Tabasco Verdasco vs Baby Ali (All that was going through my mind was “Heaven, must be missin angels”

Juan Monaco of Argentina

Here's a better look. Dios Mio

Tommy Haas

I mean you know I am always a fan of Tommy Haas as I affectionately call him “Head and Shoulders” but in real person, he definitely has a shot to get it. Monaco well, we have to something about that hair but that’s just me nitpicking…he is muy caliente. When I got to the match, he was putting the finishing touches on Head and Shoulders. It is a shame that unfortunate incidents have followed Haas in his career. He was a brilliant player but he got into a motorcycle accident which took him out for like a year I think and also slipped on a loose ball at Wimbledon which caused his ankle to blow up like a balloon. Added to other injuries, he never really made it to his true potential. Anyway, he was out and up comes Verdasco and Tsonga. My eyes were in sugar shock.

Tabasco Verdasco v Baby Ali

Anyway, I have to tell you about an incident that was unfolding as I was watching the match. Now if you haven’t seen to the Billie Jean Tennis Center looking at the graphic below, you can see that the Louis Armstrong stadium is connected to the Grandstand.

Map

Now Kuzi-Rex and Akgul were playing on Armstrong so Baby Ali and Tabasco Verdasco were playing on Grandstand where they were SCHEDULED to play. There were no changes in the schedule. Now, because the men’s matches were a hot ticket, the Grandstand was full but you can look over in the Grandstand from a balcony on Armstrong or if you go to the very top of Armstrong you can look over into the stadium and see the match. I was forced to watch the match from the balcony. It was not a bad view at all. Anyway, after the Kuzi-Rex match, Kuzi Rex won in straight sets and was through to the Round of 16 to face Danish Biscuit, world’s no. 1 Caroline Wozniacki, the officials closed the court (Armstrong) and asked the people to leave including the people who were only inside the stadium to watch the Tsonga v Verdasco match. I have to say that this was really the hot ticket at the time. I mean they were two hot players and also the quality of play was expected to be good. They are both top ranked players.

She' the one in the blue muumuu and her "friend" is next to her in the pink shirt. I was up there watching the match at one point

Anyway, this one young lady took serious exception to security’s mandate that they leave the stadium. She took great offense to this matter and told the security guard, “It;s obvious that the USTA (US Tennis Association) made a MISTAKE by putting the Tsonga match on the smaller court. Therefore allow us to be in the empty stadium.” Now, this girl is either a law/medical student and she went on to “reason” with the man saying that he can simply have one security guard watch them. Mind you it was not just her but an entire crowd of people wanting to line the back wall. This security officer, obviously a religious man because I would have told her what was the MISTAKE beginning with her tragic outfit which was meant either for bedtime or pregnancy and her obvious gay balding (think Chia pet) boyfriend who God forbid was wearing inappropriate shoes with no socks (I just knew he had no socks on….he looked the type) and wearing a size medium pink shirt when he is clearly an XL on a very good day, bursting out of the bloody thing like fat Hulk. But we aren’t here for that and she was not talking to me. Really the audacity of this woman. Of course she asked for the supervisor as if he was going to allow her and her “girlfriend/boyfriend” alone in an empty stadium to stand and look over at a match, something she and shim were at that very moment doing on the balcony. They even offered to find her a good spot but she refused. I mean what if the people were to have acquiesced  and she and he went over and got hurt or worse the victim of a crime (Not like he was going to protect her. I mean I think she looked more the man than he did) Then she would have been all up in arms and blaming the USTA for the entire affair. Did I mention that they had tickets to Arthur Ashe stadium and should have been there instead of screaming like some banshee? You would have thought someone had cut her off in the TJ Maxx line where she got her lil number. She was just quarter past ridiculous at this time. I on the other hand, just walked downstairs and got a perfectly good seat very close to the action and got some really nice shots.

I went and got me way better seats

Way better view!

Not that from above was bad.

A view from the balcony

Anyway after the match… Tsonga totally dominated Verdasco as he was not serving up to par and his weight of shots were totally off. He seems to not be the player he was in 2008/2009. I do not know if he’s getting lazy or perhaps his mind is elsewhere but he has really lost the edge he had before. Tsonga on the other hand was looking really good. I mean he’s the real dark horse pick of this tournament. He has a winning record against D’Juggernaut 5-4, beaten Mr. Federer the last two times they have played including at Wimbledon 2011 where Mr. Federer was up 2 sets to love. Divadal is not so well these days and I know Tsonga will not be intimidated by the Spaniard. However, Tsonga will have to beat the top three players and that’s a very very very very tall order. Anyway, I was saying is that Sloane Stephens lost to Ivanovic the Terrible in straight sets and her countryman D’Juggernaut knocked out Davydenko. Ivanovic next faces the Serenanator and D’Joker will play Dolgopolov. Andrea Petkovic also won her match and will play lady Hobbit in the next round.

This made me smile... you know how much I "love" me some Jennifer Capriati

So all in all that was my day at the US Open. It was really a wonderful experience even though I was by myself. Hope you enjoyed.

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