Realz

US Open 2013: Day 4

In Ana Ivanovic, Angelique Kerber, Bernard Tomic, Carla Suarez Narravo, Christina McHale, Daniel Evans, Feliciano Lopez, Flavia Pennetta, Gael Monfils, James Blake, Janko Tipsarevic, John Isner, Kaia Kanepi, Maria Kirilenko, Milos Raonic, Petra Kvitova, Rafael Nadal, Richard Gasquet, Roger Federer, Sabine Lisicki, Sara Errani, Serena Williams, Tennis, US Open, Venus Williams, Victoria Azarenka, Victoria Duval, Yaroslava Shevedova on August 30, 2013 at 8:58 am
Michelle Obama at the Open last Saturday... on fashion point as ALWAYS

Michelle Obama at the Open last Saturday… on fashion point as ALWAYS

So Day 4 at the US Open was a successful one. Despite it looking like the heavens were going to burst open, no rain fell to affect any scheduled play. As far as singles’ action go, I believe that all matches were played and completed. Also unlike the last major, Wimbledon, there have been very few retirements. I guess players are scrambling for the last stop to make big bucks, big points and also celebrity status. The US Open has as of late, perhaps because it is held in New York City, take on the feel of something akin the Grammys etc. Where tons of celebrities are floating around, lots of sponsors too and that unmistakable feel of entertainment energy,

 

Katie Couric, WTF is this hot mess pants. Are you kidding me? Did you ask some preschooler to design this bit for you?

This is Katie Couric, celebrity. See the problem here isn’t so much that she is wearing these pants as it is that she’s wearing these pants and wearing them in full confidence that they are the best thing ever. Boo, here’s a news flash…THEY’RE NOT!!! Stop having your children design your clothing

Before I move onto the real deal tennis, I just want to say WELCOME to any new FANZ who may be reading this blog. I hope you peruse at your leisure. Do understand that this blog does focus mainly on tennis but yet we cover so much more. It is structure (at least it is my intent) to capture tennis fans and non-tennis fans alike to reach that common goal of being a REALZ TENIS FANZ, which quite frankly is the best thing out there. DO NOT be intimidated if you are not a tennis fan because if you scroll through, you will be sure to find something that interests you in some form. There is also a Facebook Page, which I think would be more “user-friendly” as the blog might be a bit too “in-depth” for the non tennis fanz. There are tons of photos on it for your enjoyment. ALSO for the Realz fanz out there, PLEASE COMMENT and spread the word about this blog!!! You know how I am always begging for attention.

Divadal looking in his usual form

Divadal looking in his usual form

Anywho, on the men’s side, there were no upsets of note though Douchsarevic got through to the 3rd round much to my chagrin. Yeah I know, I said it. American Jock Sock who seems to go into hiding all year long only to come out for the US Open is also through to the 3rd round. I mean seriously, has this guy even won two matches on tour this year much more two in the same tournament? However, he will be getting a nice chunk of change for his effort though it could have been more. James Blake and Sock lost in the 1st round of doubles. I mean James, you could not even muster up some courage and had yourself a nice run here. WOW, sometimes, I think you suck badly out of spite. However, we are not here to discuss James Blake, he is gone. Au revoir.

Mr. Federer and Divadal Nadal moved through quite comfortably to the 3rd round. Divadal was showing all his gonads on court and Mr. Federer was looking impressively clean. They are on both side of the draw and scheduled to meet in the quarters if neither loses before then. Mr. Federer has not beaten Divadal in a major since 2007 if I am not mistaken and in the kind of form he is showing as of late, I doubt if 2013 will change that statistic. Needless to say, I am very unhappy about this prospect. Nonetheless, you know I love me some Mr. Federer and I will be waving his flag on his bandwagon until the very end and thereafter.

Daniel Evans through to the 3rd round... yeahhhh

Daniel Evans through to the 3rd round… yeahhhh

Other usual suspects came through including Canadian Milos Raonic, Frenchman Richard Gasquet, Spaniards Tommy Robredo, resident hotties FeFe Lopez and Fiery Ferrer. I have also give a HUGE SHOUT OUT to my new boo Daniel Evans for disposing for the trash in the form of Bernard Tomic aka Tampomic. Evans who scored an upset in the 1st round when he ousted the 11th seed Kei Nishikori, is showing himself as a non-one hit wonder in beating Tampomic. Evans is playing his 5th consecutive match as he came through 3 rounds of qualifying to get to the main draw. Anyway, Evans is set to play Tommy Robredo in the 3rd and possibly Mr. Federer in the Round of 16 if both win their next scheduled match. So you know what that means Evanie boo….You have my complete support until you face Mr. Federer, at which point, I will be cheering for your utter destruction on court. Sorry boo but Mr. Federer was there way before you came. However, you can come anytime you like for me 🙂

Arghhhhhhhhhhh Beetlejuice in full effect

Arghhhhhhhhhhh Beetlejuice in full effect

Anyway, the last match up of the day was BFG (John Isner) vs Beetlejuice (Gael Monfils). Now, I have never really been a fan of Monfils. I am sure he is great person off the court and if you love to party, he is definitely the guy to hang with. Though you should never be totally inebriated with him because he is the kinda guy that will cause the police to show up and though he is even more shit faced than you, he will still be able to talk the cops out of arresting him and there you are being carted off to jail and he is laughing his ass off. He also looks like a crazy prankster. Anyway we are so digressing right now. So I was saying that I have never been a huge fan of Monfils. However, last year, he earned my respect at the Aussie Open. Monfils showed a level of maturity I thought was way beyond him. I even complimented him on his 1st round match and commented on how mature he was in delving out a swift death to his opponent. But it seems as though no good deeds goes unpunished.

Fcuking crowd cheering on this French tool

Fcuking crowd cheering on this French tool

Monfils’ behaviour in his match up against Isner was utterly RIDONCULOUS. What was even worst was that the American crowd was cheering on Monfils over their player. (There is a lot I want to say about this but I do not think this is the time to focus on such matters) Monfils was throwing himself all over the place as though the match was being placed on the beach. And that his classic clownfcukery was in full display. Yes it can be entertaining but when it comes to major play, Monfils needs to be more focus. He has shown himself to be quite capable of possibly contending for majors. However, his potential is being stifled by his immaturity on court. It was a virtual shitshow last night. He practically gifted the first 2 sets to Isner and then later on tried to show some of his real tennis. However, Isner was playing such a complete match. He was firing on all cylinders and took out Monfils in 4 sets. Thank you Isner, I could not stand to see such nonsense for too long. Hopefully Isner finds his stride again here at the Open and could… I so hope and pray….knock out Divadal in their possible 4th round encounter. Actually I do not care who takes out Divadal, just take him out of here.

In America, we say goodbye. So get outta here

In America, we say goodbye. So get outta here

Anyway, check out the men’s score line below.

Sela D. (Isr) 4 4 1
Tipsarevic   J. (Srb) 6 6 6
Rufin G. (Fra) Ret. 6 1
Tursunov D. (Rus) 7 1
Gasquet R. (Fra) 6 7 7
Robert   S. (Fra) 3 5 5
Bautista-Agut R. (Esp) 3 7 1 2
Ferrer D. (Esp) 6 6 6 6  
Gonzalez M. (Arg) 6 6 5 2
Sock J. (Usa) 7 1 7 6  
Haider-Maurer A. (Aut) 4 4 5
Kukushkin M. (Kaz) 6 6 7
Tomic B. (Aus) 6 3 6 3
Evans D. (Gbr) 1 6 7 6  
Federer R. (Sui) 6 6 6
Berlocq C. (Arg) 3 2 1
Mannarino A. (Fra) 7 7 6 6  
Querrey S. (Usa) 6 6 7 4
Dodig I. (Cro) 6 6 6
Davydenko N. (Rus) 1 4 4
Roger-Vasselin E. (Fra) 3 2 7 2
Kohlschreiber P. (Ger) 6 6 5 6  
Robredo T. (Esp) 6 6 6  
Dancevic F. (Can) 4 4 1
Lopez F. (Esp) 6 7 4 7  
Klahn B. (Usa) 4 6 6 5
Andujar-Alba P. (Esp) 1 2 4
Raonic M. (Can) 6 6 6  
Silva D. R. (Bra) 2 1 0
Nadal R. (Esp) 6 6 6  
Isner J. (Usa) 7 6 4 7  
Monfils G. (Fra) 5 2 6 6
I'm just gonna take a lil nap and give this girl a slight chance to beat me

I’m just gonna take a lil nap and give this girl a slight chance to beat me

On the women’s side of the draw, things have been virtually quiet. But then again, 4th seed Sara Errani was howling on court in her defeat at the hands of her countrywoman Flavia Pennetta. Pennetta just dismantled Errani 6-3 6-1 I am not sure if I mentioned this earlier but Errani and her doubles partnership with Roberta Vinci might be in jeopardy as the two are fighting. Errani in her lost was crying that she did not want to be on court etc etc etc. Whatever Errani, you have it too good perhaps. I mean you have been able to make it to several major semis plus get to the finals of the French Open….something which considering your talent is actually beyond you. Yet you are complaining and trying to mess up the most successful thing you got. I am not interested in your tears. Save that drama for your mama but for the court.

It was not a good day for the Italian yesterday at all. She also will drop in rankings as she cannot defend her semifinal points from last year

It was not a good day for the Italian yesterday at all. She also will drop in rankings as she cannot defend her semifinal points from last year

Anyway, Carebear Kerber took out Bouchard of Canada who I think might be a talent to watch in the near future. She is pretty good and as you can see, she is not afraid of top players as she fought Serenanator in Montreal and now gave Kerber a big fight. American Christina McHale also won her match against Elena Svitolina but her countrywoman Victoria Duval who caused quite a buzz at the open when she knocked out Sam Stosur, succumbed to the pressure and was beaten by Daniela Huntuchova 6-2 6-3. In both sets, Duval was up a break but could not sustain her lead. It is also good to see that Daniela can win two matches back to back. She never fully realized her potential I think.

Duval was split in two yesterday by a seemingly in form Huntuchova

Duval was split in two yesterday by a seemingly in form Huntuchova

The Serenanator overcame a slow start to bagel her opponent in the 2nd set 6-3 6-0 meanwhile other notables such as Ana Ivanovic as well as her countrywoman Jelena Jankovic (Fivehead Jungle Witch), Kuznetsova, Kaia Kanepi, Petra Kvitova (surprise! surprise!), Sabine Lisicki, Roberta Vinci and Yaroslava Shvedova also came through in their matches. Shvedova faces the Serenanator in the next round. Should be an interesting match up. Maria Kirilenko took out the Portuguese player Maria Larcher de Brito 6-3 6-1. This is the same de Brito who took out the other Russian Maria, Maria Sharapova at Wimbledon. However, Kirilenko aka Krazilenko was sticking around for a possible upset. She just rolled out that final set breadstick like it was rushhour at Olive Garden. In other news, the Williams sisters are back playing doubles at this major. Yeah give Venus something to do. They won their 1st round match (6-7 6-0 6-3) against a Spanish duo which included Carla Suarez-Navarro who would have been Venus’s next opponent had she beaten Jie Zheng like she was suppose to have done. However, I am kinda glad that Venus lost now because I do not think she could have beaten Carla by herself and I could not deal with another Venus lost at the hands of his Lady Hobbit after the 2009 Australian Open 2nd round lost. I swear I had to lay Venus to rest in order to deal. She nearly killed me with that lost. Anyway, all the ladies’ score, after the jump.

Good Lord, the dress comes in different colours too..

Good Lord, the dress comes in different colours too..

Bouchard E. (Can) 4 6 3
Kerber A.   (Ger) 6 2 6
McHale C. (Usa) 6 3 7
Svitolina E. (Ukr) 4 6 5
Kanepi K. (Est) 6 6
Schmiedlová A. K. (Svk) 4 1
Kuznetsova S. (Rus) 6 4 6
Peng S. (Chn) 1 6 4
Makarova E. (Rus) 6 6
Mattek-Sands B. (Usa) 4 4
Nara K. (Jpn) 7 6
Cirstea S. (Rou) 5 1
Ormaechea P. (Arg) 2 3
Lisicki S. (Ger) 6 6
Safarova L. (Cze) 6 1 2
Vinci R. (Ita) 4 6 6
Shvedova Y. (Kaz) 6 6  
Mayr-Achleitner P. (Aut) 2 3
Jankovic J. (Srb) 6 6  
Kleybanova A. (Rus) 3 2
Pennetta F. (Ita) 6 6
Errani S. (Ita) 3 1
Cornet A. (Fra) 6 6  
Tomljanovic A. (Cro) 2 2
Vesnina E. (Rus) 1 4
Knapp K. (Ita) 6 6  
Williams S. (Usa) 6 6  
Voskoboeva G. (Kaz) 3 0
Ivanovic A. (Srb) 6 6  
Dulgheru A. (Rou) 2 1
Vekic D. (Cro) 2 1
Halep S. (Rou) 6 6  
Kvitova P. (Cze) 6 6  
Jovanovski B. (Srb) 2 4
Riske A. (Usa) 6 6  
Barthel M. (Ger) 4 2
Glushko J. (Isr) 7 6
Vickery S. (Usa) 5 3
Kirilenko M. (Rus) 6 6  
Larcher de Brito M. (Por) 3 1
Wozniak A. (Can) 3 1
Azarenka V. (Blr) 6 6  
Giorgi C. (Ita) 6 7  
Hsieh S-W. (Tpe) 4 6
Wozniacki C. (Den) 6 6
Scheepers C. (Rsa) 1 2
Hantuchova D. (Svk) 6 6  
Duval V. (Usa) 2 3
Look who showed up to watch "her man" at the Open... It's Xisca

Look who showed up to watch “her man” at the Open… It’s Xisca

And look who is happy to see her?

And look who is happy to see her?

Look the camera...

Look the camera…

Everyone fake laugh....

Everyone fake laugh….

Kuznetsova, what the hell is this tragedy? I thought we were making progressing in the fashion department

Kuznetsova, what the hell is this tragedy? I thought we were making progressing in the fashion department

Vickie why are you still wearing this ridiculous outfit?

Vickie why are you still wearing this ridiculous outfit?

Can someone explain to me this madness?

Can someone explain to me this madness?

Kvitova, you are determined to cart around this muffin top no matter what right?

Kvitova, you are determined to cart around this muffin top no matter what right?

 

Ana why even though you're flat chested, your boobs look lopsided?

Ana why even though you’re flat chested, your boobs look lopsided?

Helloooooo? Is anything in there??? It sounds so hallow..

Helloooooo? Is anything in there??? It sounds so hallow..

 

I wonder if my booty is bigger than the Serenanator's?

I wonder if my booty is bigger than the Serenanator’s?

Excuse you? You really wanna know?

Excuse you? You really wanna know?

 

HELLZ NOOOO

HELLZ NOOOO

I am

I am

A stinker...

A stinker…

a douche... a tampomic

a douche… a tampomic

and a tool

and a tool

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  1. Where be days 5-8? I miss reading this blog.

    • I am sorry. They are currently being posted as we speak…I have finally made it all the way to Day 10. I am so easily distracted especially since I am watching a lot of matches.

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