Realz

Australian Open 2014: Day 3

In Ana Ivanovic, Andrea Petkovic, Australian Open, Ekaterina Makarova, Feliciano Lopez, Flavia Pennetta, Jerzy Janowicz, Jie Zheng, Li Na, Lleyton Hewitt, Mikhail Youzhny, Na Li, Novak Djokovic, Sabine Lisicki, Sam Stosur, Serena Williams, Tomas Berdych on January 15, 2014 at 11:34 pm
CLT+ALT+DEL

CLT+ALT+DEL

Hey Fanz I am so sorry that this posting is coming to you at about the time that Day 4 is set to begin at the Australian Open. Well technically, Day 4 has already begun. I was having extreme technical difficulties. I just found out that the hard drive on my laptop is damaged and that I will loose everything that is on it. This is a bummer and a half. I do not know much about computers. Needless to say that I am hot like the weather in Australia. The only good thing is that the computer is still under warranty. My desktop was not working so well but that was a simple easier fix. So I can post this and the others hopefully.

I think someone is literally being barbequed right now

I think someone is literally being barbequed right now

To the tennis: MY GOD IT IS HOT DOWN UNDER. Everyone is complaining about the heat. I mean we all know that it is hot in Australia at this time but now it is RIDONCULOUS. #Globalwarmingmuch The on court temperatures are hotter than outside temperatures and players are burning up…and not in the good way. It is mainly survival tennis at this time…ie if they can survive the heat to play tennis..

Shade... I must get to the shade...

Shade… I must get to the shade…

But let’s get to the results.

It was a semi-tough day out there for the Chinese but she is through to the 3rd round

It was a semi-tough day out there for the Chinese but she is through to the 3rd round

LiNaLi won her matchup in sorta convincing fashion. LiNaLi won the 1st set in bagel fashion but struggled in the 2nd as Belinda Bencic started to play for real now. However, get valiant effort didn’t pay off as she lost in the tiebreaker. The Swiss is one of the younglings to keep an eye on for the future. The Serenanator was far more routine in her victory 6-1 6-2. Sam D’Stove Stosur is finding her game in Australia again these days as she took out the ever dangerous Pironkova in straight sets 6-2 6-0. Pironkova however had a broken crotch and was clearly hampered by this. Nonetheless, D’Stove will take the win. I believe she’ll face Ana the Terrible for a place in the Round of 16 where the winner will face the Serenanator if current form holds true.

I am ready for these itches...BRING IT ON

I am ready for these itches…BRING IT ON

Several seeded players lost their way to the 3rd round. Lisicki (15) didn’t get the rest of the game plan for the 2nd and 3rd sets from Hingis as after winning the 1st set 6-2 over Niculescu, she basically didn’t even know her way to Sesame Street. Lisicki had a blonde moment that lasted the rest of the match. Meanwhile, Niculescu seized the moment to hold serve and fried up a two piece combo meal for Lisicki. Niculescu 2-6 6-2 6-2
Casey Dellacqua gave Australia much to smile about as she trashed 18th seed Kristen Flipkens 6-3 6-0.

Lisicki in the 1st set!

Lisicki in the 1st set!

Losicki after the 2nd and 3rd sets

Losicki after the 2nd and 3rd sets

Most of the other seeded players came through for the 3rd round including Carebear Kerber (9),Ana the Terrible (14) Makarova (22), Safarova (26) aka Lady Gollum, Flavia Penne Pasta (28),Eugenie Bouchard (30) and Daniela Hepburnova (31) who won 12-10 in the 3rd set.

Eugenie Bouchard of Canada... honey you bought that outfit from a moose in Saskatchewan?

Eugenie Bouchard of Canada… honey you bought that outfit from a moose in Saskatchewan?

One would think that with all these gay fans, she would not be committing these fashion atrocities... But I guess that's how they roll in Canada

One would think that with all these gay fans, she would not be committing these fashion atrocities… But I guess that’s how they roll in Canada

Other notable winners included Americans Laura Davis who dismissed Julia Goerges in 3 sets, Alison Riske who handed out unlimited breadsticks to Yanina Wickmayer 6-1 6-1, Moaning Mona Barthel who is benefitting from the ousting of Petra Kvitova. Jie Zheng former semifinalist here in 2010 also won with a 3 set victory over American Madison Keys.

Djoker is all business with his easy bake oven draw

Djoker is all business with his easy bake oven draw

I'm sorry but Boris Becker looks like an overexuberant butch lesbian soccer mom

I’m sorry but Boris Becker looks like an overexuberant butch lesbian soccer mom

On the men’s side Djoker Harlequeen isn’t wasting time on court as he dismissed his opponent on convincing fashion 6-0 6-4 6-4. Berdshite also won in straight sets. Fiery Ferrer needed 4 sets to get through the 3rd round. He’s randomly dropping sets these days so look for and early round lost from the Spaniard. I don’t see him getting to the latter stages of this major. Sam Querry aka the Grinch took out the 23rd seed Ernst Gulbis in straight sets. I hope no one was betting on Gulbis because he’s never sure money unless you’re betting on his opponent. Gulbis ever remains that enigma. I was actually surprised that he was seeded here and so high. Nonetheless, very good of Sam to try to salvage American mens tennis. They need all the big wins they can get.

The Grinch is trying to steal his way into the latter stages of a major

The Grinch is trying to steal his way into the latter stages of a major

There were two other seeded players who got dispersed but wasn’t really make losses. Youzhny (14) lost to Florian Mayer in 5 sets. I expected more from the Russian but I forgot he’s Russian and meltdown is inevitable. His compatriot 30th seed Dmitry Tursunov fell to Denis Istomin in 4 sets. Istomin is a dangerous floater so watch him. Ivan Dodig (32) had to retire in the 4th set.

I hope you aall didn't forget about me

I hope you aall didn’t forget about me

Things are so bad with Davydenko these days, he got himself a tan.

Things are so bad with Davydenko these days, he got himself a tan.

Despite this, most of the other seeded players played their parts to the hilt and were able to move through to play another day. Gasquet (9) came through in straight sets over Nikolay Davydenko. I expected at least 4 sets from this match but Gasquet is playing smart tennis these days at majors. Good of him. High time now he produces the top level tennis we all hoped he would give. Pity he came win a major unless a plague hits the draw. However he’s not the only one praying for the locusts to fly, Fabio Fognini (15), Tommy Robredo (17), Kevin Anderson (19), Jerzy Janowicz (20), Jeremy Chardy (29) all hope that God would send the floods again to wash the top 6 away because the Red Sea will part again before they win a major whilst the top 6 are alive and well in the draw. They can barely win regular tour tournaments much more hoist a major trophy. When was the last time one of the top 6 didn’t win the master level trophy? Probably like 2011 and that was just one person I think.

Florian Mayer working himself through to the 3rd round

Florian Mayer working himself through to the 3rd round

Anyway in regards to that much anticipated showdown between Matthew Ebden and Vasek Pospisil (28) Pospisil won of course in 4 sets giving the Aussie a breadstick to wave to the crowd in the 4th set 3-6 7-6 7-6 6-1 what a waste!

Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed this posting despite it’s late arrival….

She might not be pretty in pink but she sure is powerful! You know a woman is doing it and doing it right when she got her man carrying the purse! ReRe that lil pouchette is killing me

She might not be pretty in pink but she sure is powerful! You know a woman is doing it and doing it right when she got her man carrying the purse! ReRe that lil pouchette is killing me

I thought Stella was improving... simple, clean, effective and cute

I thought Stella was improving… simple, clean, effective and cute

Then I saw this mess...

Then I saw this mess…

Stella needs to STOP!!! Can't the fashion court step in and issue an injuction against Stella and all her designing ideas??

Stella needs to STOP!!! Why can’t I get a real endorsement deal and be spared from this garbage??

Berdshite is a soccer player now?? I mean seriously H&M can't you do better than this

Berdshite is a soccer player now?? I mean seriously H&M can’t you do better than this

Kuzi, I don't know what got into you and the stars but I need for you to night night to this hideous dress... NO BUENO

Kuzi, I don’t know what got into you and the stars but I need for you to night night to this hideous dress… NO BUENO

Checkmate!! Move this piece off the board IMMEDIATELY

Checkmate!! Move this piece off the board IMMEDIATELY

Keep staring at the wall... You are on punishment for that skirt!!

Keep staring at the wall… You are on punishment for that skirt!!

Hot head!!

Hot head!!

My ears are melting!

My ears are melting!

Sleepytime

Sleepytime

What had happened? What you mean it is not nap time??

What had happened? What you mean it is not nap time??

WTF?? His teeth matches his shirt! I know times are changing and tennis all about colours but we can at least keep our teeth white to pay hommage... that's just FOUL..

WTF?? His teeth matches his shirt! I know times are changing and tennis all about colours but we can at least keep our teeth white to pay hommage… that’s just FOUL..

2014+Australian+Open+Day+3+senb7HNDFi8l

Monica…this face is not okay!! You are scaring the children!!

The best thing about Andy Murray is Daniel Vallverdu

The best thing about Andy Murray is Daniel Vallverdu

My Revlon EverLast lipstick is really working!!

I think so too… he is delish!!

Djoker is showing his "treasure chest"

Djoker is showing his “treasure chest”

I am not impressed

I am not impressed

Berdshite showing off the clean smooth look

Berdshite showing off the clean smooth look

Hmmm I might want a taste of some of that but...

Hmmm I might want a taste of some of that but…

I think I am sexy and I hope you think so too

I think I am sexy and I hope you think so too

It's okay but still

It’s okay but still

A Brazilian and a Spaniard combo

A Brazilian and a Spaniard combo

YES now this is what I am talking about... I am definitely get behind this kinda meal combo

YES now this is what I am talking about… I am definitely get behind this kinda meal combo

Huh?? What are you doing? I told you my wrist is hurting?

Huh?? What are you doing? I told you, it is my wrist that’s hurting

YEAHHHHHHHH TAKE IT LIKE A MAN... TAKE IT

YEAHHHHHHHH TAKE IT LIKE A MAN… TAKE IT I see gaynesia about to happen in 5, 4, 3, 2…

I'm trying...

I’m trying…

Hey Realz, I am talking to you... Stop saying shit about my man Lleyton. Yes I did done stole him from Kim but that's none of your business. She was flexible is true but my mouth made up for it in bed and Lleyton chose me. I will not tolerate any more smack about him. I will hunt you down like a dog if you say one more thing about him. You have been warned!

Hey Realz, I am talking to you… Stop saying shit about my man Lleyton. Yes I did done stole him from Kim but that’s none of your business. She was flexible is true but my mouth made up for it in bed and Lleyton chose me. I will not tolerate any more smack about him. I will hunt you down like a dog if you say one more thing about him. You have been warned!

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