Realz

Wimbledon 2014: Day 2

In Carla Suarez Narravo, Caroline Wozniacki, Christina McHale, Daniela Hantuchova, Francesca Schiavone, Gael Monfils, Jerzy Janowicz, Jie Zheng, Jo-Wilfried Tsonga, John Isner, Lukas Rosol, Maria Sharapova, Marion Bartoli, Mikhail Kukushkin, Milos Raonic, Rafael Nadal, Richard Gasquet, Roberta Vinci, Roger Federer, Sabine Lisicki, Sara Errani, Serena Williams, Stanislas Wawrinka, Svetlana Kuznetsova, Tsvetana Pironkova, Urszula Radwanska, Varvara Lepchenko, Victoria Duval, Wimbledon on June 25, 2014 at 10:02 am

Day 2

So here we are with Day 2 at the 2014 Wimbledon Championships. Nearly all matches were completed and most of the big names got through to the 2nd round. However, there were some upsets mostly on the women’s side. The men seem to be in it for the money; 1st round money is very good but 2nd round money is even better.

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Divadal finally made it to the 2nd round of a grass court tournament

Divadal (2) won his 1st round match … well that is to say that he finally won a match on grass. He took out Martin Klizan 4-6 6-3 6-3 6-3. Interestingly enough they met last year at the French Open in the 2nd round. The scoreline was the same. Klizan had his chances to do much more but he could not execute on the big points. Divadal does not look so smooth but it does not matter. A win is a win. You don’t win a major in the first week but you sure can lose one. Things are even more interesting because guess who Divadal is playing in the 2nd round …. None other than Lukas Rosol himself; the man who started Divadal’s troubles on grass back in 2012 when he dismissed him at Wimbledon in the 2nd round. After that loss, Divadal disappeared from tour claiming “The Knees were acting up.” He returned to the tour in February 2013. Divadal did not lose a single match on hard court all of 2013. Now I am not starting any rumours here, I am just stating facts. Rosol took out French hotness Benoit Paire in his opening round match 6-3 3-6 7-6 6-4. It is very very very very unlikely that Rosol will score another upset but non-fanz of Divadal will be ever hopeful that lightening will strike twice.

SHIT! I thought I was going to get that upset today

SHIT! I thought I was going to get that upset today

Anyway we digress, Baby Ali (14) finished up his match against Meltdown by serving it out at love 6-1 3-6 3-6 6-2 6-4. When rain interrupted play on Monday, Baby Ali was up 5-4 in the 5th. Also finishing up his match was Sam Querrey aka The Grinch. He knocked out fellow American Bradley Klahn 6-7 6-4 6-1 7-5.

Even though he only played one game today, you know we hardly need an excuse to show Baby Ali

Even though he only played one game today, you know we hardly need an excuse to show Baby Ali

Mr. Federer (4) won his match with relative ease 6-1 6-1 6-3. He took out Italian Paolo Lorenzi. Mr. Federer had 9 aces, 40 winners and 20 errors. However, a lot of those errors came about as a result of poor execution. I can’t deal with a sloppy Federror. He needs to do better. His level of play will suffice for the scrubs and lower tiers of the ATP but when he meets the likes Goonie Gulbis, Divadal et al, it will not hold up at all. Nonetheless we move on: Fellow Swiss player, Stan the Man (5) or “Stanimal” as he being called… for me Wawrinka cannot be a “Stanimal” when he is losing regular tour matches to scrubs on a regular basis. When he has multiple majors and master series title, then he’ll be “Stanimal” for now he is just “Stan the Man” who beat Divadal’s @$$ in the Aussie Open final causing Divadal to claim “bad back.” Anyway, Stan the Man took out hotness Joao Sousa 6-3 6-4 6-3. Stan had 18 aces. That’s some big boy serving.

Mr. Federer

Mr. Federer

Stan the Man

Stan the Man

Other seeded players who won include up and coming contenders Milos Raonic aka Dennis the Menace (8), BFG Isner (9), Kei Nishikori (10), Richard Gasquet (13) who needed 5 sets to get rid of his opponent, James Duckworth 6-7 6-3 3-6 6-0 6-1. Jerzy Janowicz (15) also needed 5 sets to get past Somdev Dewarman 4-6 6-3 6-3 3-6 6-3. FeFe Lopez (19) who must be super exhausted having played two weeks of tennis coming into this tournament. Lopez won three tiebreaker sets to move through to the 2nd round. Philipp Kohlschreiber (22) won in straight sets as did Beetlejuice (24). Tommy Robredo (22) won his 1st round match in 4 sets.

I gotta say that one arm bit looks really cool on Dennis the Menace Raonic

I gotta say that one arm bit looks really cool on Dennis the Menace Raonic

Several players of interest also won today including Nick Kyrgios of Australia (a hottie, if you like that thickish of Greek and Malay heritage) and fellow Aussie Llyeton Hewitt. Gilles Muller who took out Andy Roddick in 2005 1st round also won as did American Jock Sock, Lukas Kubot, quarterfinalist here last year, Jarrko Nieminen and Mikhail Kukushkin. There were several upsets including unseeded Alejandro Falla who did well on the grass leading up to Wimbledon; he lost in straight sets to Ante Pavic of Croatia. Guillermo Garcia-Lopez (28) lost to Dusan Lajovic in 5 sets; Ivo Karlovic (29) lost in straight sets to Franck Dancevic and Dimitri Tursunov (32) lost to Denis Istomin. So that’s about it for the men’s.

BFG Isner will now be known as the Troll

BFG Isner will now be known as the Troll

Oh I just want to point you to a story regarding John Isner aka BFG … (See link below) http://trollandgarros.tumblr.com/post/89253044033/isner-puts-his-white-privilege-on-display-says-the  It is a really good read. See I really have an issue with Isner’s comments. First off, I do not know why or how he felt he had the necessary “credentials” to weigh in on this matter. However, I like the fact that the author of this piece served up some “truth tea detox” Second since I am in FULL agreement … well let me know say full but I am with the author on many of his salient points AND also somewhat dismayed by Isner’s ensuing comments when others tried to enlighten him; I am going to change Isner’s name. From henceforth, BFG which means Big Friendly Giant will just still be “Troll” or perhaps “Mountain Troll” I would really like to hear from you on this matter. I do not understand how people can think “Redskins” is okay to be calling a professional football time. I mean I do not even know why the sport is even called “football” but we not even going to touch that one.

BFG is now a Troll

BFG is now a Troll

On the women’s side: The Serenanator (1) is looking good. She had a tough opening service game which took her 10 minutes to complete. She later said that she played well but the girl was hitting some good shots. Anyway, the demons did not come out because the Serenanator was all over Ana Tatishivili as she took her out 6-1 6-2. She had 31 winners of which 16 were aces and 13 unforced errors. Those are some healthy numbers; very very healthy and positive. Hopefully she keeps this up because the road ahead is going to be intense and there can be no letting up of the focus and intensity.

The Serenanator is ready to do battle at Wimbledon

The Serenanator is ready to do battle at Wimbledon

Simona Halep (3) who I swear looks like the Koolaid Juice Jug (I know it is wrong but I swear it is what comes to mind every single time) also had a quick affair on the court. She moved through in straight sets as did Bratzwanska (4), Shriekapova (5) who is supposedly looking good 6-1 6-0 but judging by the numbers, 13 winners, 9 errors, 3 aces and 5 double faults, 43% on 2nd serve, I am going to say “meh.” This is Shriekapova just handling the Lady planktons with her usual ruthless flair. Carebear Kerber (9) took out lil sis Radwanska in straight sets also. Ivanovic The Terrible (11) was almost in trouble against Francesco Schiabone. However, it seemed as though Schiabone had other ideas in mind than winning the big points. Maybe it was the longer hair or the slight attempt to feminize herself that was mucking up her game. Who knows and who cares? Anyway, Ana won in straight sets. 2013 finalist Sabine Losicki (19) also won in straight sets. The German took out Israeli Julia Glushko 6-2 6-1.

I think Shriekapova is going to a picnic or something with that much bags

I think Shriekapova is going to a picnic or something with that much bags

Other seeded players who came through include Genie Bouchard (13), Carlo Suarez-Navarro (15), Danish Biscuit Wozniacki (16), Kristopher Flipkens (24) last year’s semifinalist, Cornemort (25) and Klara Koukalova (31) who took out American Taylor Townsend in straight sets 7-5 6-2. Other winners of interest are Jie Zheng, Madison Keys who took out another young hopeful Monica Puig in straight sets, Varvane Lepchenko who dismissed Tsetvana Pironkova (Granny Vee thanks you Lepchenko), Heather Watson of England, Belinda Bencic of Switzerland and Camila Giorgi of Italy.

Bye Gurl Pironkova! Bye!

Bye Gurl Pironkova! Bye!

There were several key upsets on the ladies side biggest of which was Fivehand Jungle Witch Jankovic (7) who was dismantled by Kaia Kanepi, quarterfinalist here last year. Kanepi took care of business 6-3 6-2. Fattychunkova (26) lost in 3 sets to American Alison Riske as did fellow Russian Kuzi Rex (28) who lost to Michelle Larcher De Brito. Roberta Vinci (21) and doubles partner Sara ETranni (14) will be concentrating solely on doubles this Wimbledon as they were both booted out of the singles draw in three sets. Vinci lost to Donna Vekic 4-6 6-4 4-6 and ETranni lost to Caroline Garcia 6-2 6-7 5-7. Sorana Cirstea (29) was also sent packing when she lost to American qualifier Victoria Duval 4-6 6-3 1-6. American Christina McHale was also dismissed.

I was this close to winning the match!

I was this close to winning the match!

Kuzi-Rex what a disappointment!!

Kuzi-Rex what a disappointment!!

Anyway, that’s all folks … Day 3 action will feature Lochness Monster, Djoker, Granny Vee, GHW Kvitova, Tampomic, Maria’s hangbag Dimitrov, Bratzwanska, Berdshite and many others… So PLEASE check us out. DO NOT FORGET TO COMMENT even if just about the pictures…

So Bartoli showed up on Centre Court and she was all teary eye

So Bartoli showed up on Centre Court and she was all teary eye … I too got all teary eye watching this hideous outfit unfold (White and off white lace combination and the necklace #icant)

Now I don't want to hate but really gurl? Really? We are wearing white lace like some Victorian age bride? And those shoes? I think they are to hide her infamous cankles

Now I don’t want to hate but really gurl? Really? Those shoes? I think they are to hide her infamous cankles but still

Even Lisicki is like WTF?? Gurl what happened? Those shoes honey are just You look...you look... you look plentiful

Even Lisicki is like WTF?? Gurl what happened? Those shoes honey are just You look…you look… you look so plentiful. Eating well in retirement I see”  Meanwhile, what is that stain on the bottom of that “dress” ? Actually, I don’t wanna know

Joao Sousa from Portugal

Joao Sousa from Portugal

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Martin Klizan, you might be a loser in the 1st round but you’re a winner in our hearts here at Realz… and we have a “special prize” for you

You lost on the tennis court today Daniela but you're definitely winning in fashion court

You lost on the tennis court today Daniela but you’re definitely winning in fashion court

Veteran hottie around these parts is looking a bit weathered but he can still get it

Veteran hottie around these parts is looking a bit weathered but he can still get it

We don't even know his name and we don't even know that.... We just need to know where he's staying

We don’t even know his name and we’re not even trying to find out either….What we need to know is where he’s staying

Looking cute as ever

Lisicki looking cute as ever … we’re gonna ignore the snaggletooth

Beetlejuice... gurl.. How you doing?

Beetlejuice… gurl.. this is definitely not cute even by your standards

Beetlejuice got himself for cornrows ... Definitely has not improved his look but to be honest, it doesn't hurt it either

Beetlejuice got himself cornrows … Definitely has not improved his look but to be honest, it doesn’t hurt it either

Of course you we gotta talk about Carlo

Of course you we gotta talk about Carlo

Francisco is trying to give us femme realness

Francisco is trying to give us femme realness

I've fallen....

I’ve fallen….

And I can't get up

And I can’t get up

Gurl, why you acting like a heifer eating the grass? We don't behave like that at Wimbledon

Gurl, why you acting like a heifer eating the grass? We don’t behave like that at Wimbledon

Don't you wish you had a sexy coach like me

Don’t you wish you had a sexy coach like me

Tiann, I think Danish Biscuit is saying hi to you .... and she's being a bit insensitive about the matter

Tiann, I think Danish Biscuit is saying hello to you …. and she’s being a bit insensitive about the matter

Hewitt is going all out to stay in the game

Hewitt is going all out to stay in the game

Mrs. Hewitt keeping tabs on her "investment" This mofo better not get injured again

Mrs. Hewitt keeping tabs on her “investment” This mofo better not get injured again

Is Patrick M going to sing an aria?

Is Patrick M going to sing an aria?

He is channeling some soprano realness here

He is channeling some soprano realness here

Cornemort had a nose bleed on court ... blood magic I say!!

Cornemort had a nose bleed on court … blood magic I say … blood magic!!

Now we have discussed "Gayneisa" here before; where "straight" guys blame their homosexual tendencies on liquor. "I got really wasted with the guys again and then one thing lead (my pant) to another (their pants) and then another (the undies) and next thing you know, his penis was in my mouth and mine was in his. I don't know why that keep happening"

Now we have discussed “Gayneisa” here before; where “straight” guys blame their homosexual tendencies on liquor. “I got really wasted with the guys again and then one thing (my pants) lead to another (their pants) and then another (the undies) and next thing you know, his penis was in my mouth and mine was in his. I don’t know why that keep happening. I sobered up and was like Broooo we are never doing this again”

Gaynesia is not to be confused with just being "gay" BIG DIFFERENCE

Gaynesia is not to be confused with just being “gay” BIG DIFFERENCE

This is gaynesia. See the different? Good

This is gaynesia. See the different? Good

Now we have discussed "Gayneisa" here before; where "straight" guys blame their homosexual tendencies on liquor. Now what we have a new Realz term for you: "Gaylusion" this is where straight women cannot seem to see they're a fag hag. I mean look at this scene. Holla if you believe there is a straight couple in the midst wearing a yellow shirt

 Now we have a new Realz term for you: “Gaylusion” this is where straight women cannot seem to see they’re a fag hag. I mean look at this scene. Holla if you believe there is a straight couple in the midst wearing a yellow shirt .. those two girls to the side in those short shorts may have just realized that this just might not be where they need to be at “Gurl, I don’t think any of these guys are our types. Really? Why you say that? Gurl look at the front row, it’s a men’s chorale up in here. Look at that soprano in the green shorts! We need to go.” Lady in the red cap, she definitely knows the dealio. Girls, these boys are strictly dickly! 

Meanwhile, YESSS I finally won a match on grass

Meanwhile, YESSS I finally won a match on grass

Gurl, that pocketbook is FABULOUS!!

Now check out my pocketbook. Isn’t it just FABULOUS

Simona Halep

Simona Halep

The Koolaide Jug ... enough said

The Koolaide Jug … enough said

 

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  1. I talk to people at work and in social settings about the Redskins and almost everyone agrees that the Redskins name should stay except me. I don’t understand why people don’t think it’s offensive.

    • This is why if human rights were left up to a popular vote, slavery would still be existence. Humans just disappoint time after time. I bet most of them said some shit like “it has been that way for so long, why mess with tradition” or “Why are they being so sensitive? It’s not that serious! They should just get over it” This situation just shows how very ridiculous we as people are and how even more so that racism exists as well as how difficult the task of eradicating it is. The Native American people have been trying to get rid of this name for years. People think standing up to “Big government” is what they are doing here and not being absolutely racist and daresay stupid. Isner aka Mountain Troll clearly showing how “out of touch” he is with how the world works.

  2. You are correct. Most of their answers has to do with the fact that “it’s always been their name and nobody had a problem with it before.” As if somehow that’s a good excuse.

    As for Isner, he is a white man who grew up in the South so I don’t think he’s trolling so much as he is ignorant. The guy graduated from University of Georgia so we know he’s not an intellectual titan. In fact, rather than BFG, you should from now on call him the Notorious B.I.G. (Big Ignorant Giant)

    • Interesting, I do like the new Moniker. But not really Notorious. The B.I.G Isner is nice. However, him being from down South is no real excuse. I know a lot of decent Southern folks. However, people have always complained about the name before as the writer noted. It was actually struck down before under the Bush administration. However, they got the decision overturned by a bias judge. I really wish he would hold his tongue… well more so his finger. And that he was being enlightened to the truth but yet going on in the same vain was even more so annoying

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