Realz

Wimbledon 2014: Day 6

In Alize Cornet, Ana Ivanovic, Angelique Kerber, Dominika Cibulkova, Jerzy Janowicz, Jiri Vesely, John Isner, Maria Sharapova, Milos Raonic, Nick Kyrgios, Rafael Nadal, Roger Federer, Sabine Lisicki, Serena Williams, Tommy Robredo, Wimbledon on June 30, 2014 at 1:40 pm
Like serious Wimbledon, WTMFF

Like serious Wimbledon, WTMFF

Yet again, another day where I can hardly speak. I am near done with this Wimbledon. Well the big news of the weekend is that the Serenanator (1) went out to Alizé Cornet (25) aka Cornemort. Oh boy was this a disappointment. I mean the Serenanator looked deactivated. She was mess. She started off a bit messy but then after that she was en pointe. Then after taking the 1st set 6-1, she went totally offline. Cornemort was the one dictating play throughout for the rest of the match. She used some unforgiveable curse on ReRe. Gurl was all over the Serenanator like white on rice. It was like ReRe flatlined or something. It was not looking too good. It is a real disappointment when ReRe is not around because madness ensues. Anyway good on Cornemort for taking this match. This is only the 2nd time she has made it to the 2nd week of a major in her career. This is also her 34th major appearance. Congrats gurl, you’re moving up.

I can't get my life together at all!!

I can’t get my life together at all!!

YESSS GAWDDD I did it again!!

YESSS GAWDDD I did it again!! Dark Lord Cornemort Rising

Just remember gurl, I got your number and I will be all over you next time

Just remember gurl, Revenge for beating my sister again. I got your number; I’m gonna go all postal on your @$$

Also I want to point out that Cornet was being blatantly coached from the sidelines. Her coach was making all kinds of hand gestures etc. It was ridiculous. Of course guess who was the chair umpire, Mariana Alves. Yes the same who “screwed” Serena in the 2005 US Open. Another interesting notorious figure present on court, the same lineswoman ReRe chewed out. It was just a bad day for the American. The rain was making that weave a mess and all. It was horrible. The world was stunned by this result. Please do not think I am bitter about this loss at all. I am only annoyed that Cornet might more than likely lose in the next round against Bouchard (13). Bouchard is not going to let an opportunity like this go astray. Bouchard took out Andrea Petkovic (20) 6-3 6-4

Genie Bouchard

Genie Bouchard

Anyway on to other winners. So Martha aka Maria aka Shriekapova (5) just totally dragged Alison Riske across Centre Court like she tried to snatch her wig and exposed her lacefront. It was not cute. Riske broke Shriekapova was got a lead of 3-1. Then homegurl never won another game in the match! Shriekapova just beat that gurl down on court; it was like when animals attacked. Shriekapova won 11 straight games for 6-3 6-0 victory. She is into the 2nd week of Wimbledon and from here on end to the rest of the year, homegurl is only adding points. She did not play for the rest of the year after Wimbledon last year.

YES!!! Serenanator is gone! Bye GURL!!

YES!!! Serenanator is gone! Bye GURL!!

Mrs. Koolaide Jug (3) also won her match as she beat rising star Belinda Bencic of Switzerland. Bencic is allegedly the protégée of Martina Hingis. I wonder if these young girls realize that Martina loves the limelight … Martina is all about hogging the attention. She was working with Lisicki and then dropped her to go play doubles. Now she lost in the 1st round of doubles. Martina gurl get a life. Either you trying to be a coach or you’re still an active player. You cannot do both particularly if people are putting their careers in your hands. Two other winners Carebear Kerber (9) who after dropping the opening set to Kirsten Flipkens (24) 3-6, roared back to take it 6-3 6-2. A surprise player in the 4th round is a Zarina Diyas from Kazakhstan. Diyas beat 2010 finalist Vera Zvonareva in 3 sets also.

Rain interrupted much of the day's play

Rain interrupted much of the day’s play

The rest of the ladies 3rd round matches would be played on Monday as would the remaining men’s 3rd round. There are several 4th round battles on the ladies side that would also be play most highly featured match being Bouchard (13) v Cornemort.

He was down but unfortunately not out!!

He was down but unfortunately not out!!

Divadal for the third successive match dropped the 1st set. However, he came back in roaring fashion against Kukushkin. 6-7 6-1 6-1 6-1. Divadal baked up triple breadsticks. I swear these scrubs be looking for trouble. I do not know what’s the point of taking a set from Divadal if you have no intention of winning the match or at least another set? They be acting as though one is being paid by the number of sets they play. And straight that Divadal is lacking focus and concentration in the beginning of matches. Or perhaps this is all some crazy ploy to get attention for himself. Who knows or who cares? All I want to know is who is going to take three sets from him in this tournament?

Hello I'm still here

Hello I’m still here

Anywho, Mr. Federer is showing great form through 3 rounds here at Wimbledon. He knocked out Santiago Giraldo 6-3 6-1 6-3. Now I am not made that Mr. Federer is showing great form thus far. My issue is that will this hold up against the big boys. He has Stan the Man possibly in the quarterfinals and then potentially Divadal. #trouble No Bueno. And now that he is through to the 4th round, he will face none other than Tommy Robredo (23) who took out Mr. Federer at this stage last year at the US Open. Robredo beat Jerzy Janowicz (15) 6-2 6-4 6-7 4-6 6-3. Mr. Federer you best deal with this case. I can’t deal with another early round major lost. Also Dennis the Menace Raonic (8) took out last year’s quarterfinalist, Lukas Kubot in straight sets 7-6 7-6 6-2. There was also an interesting matchup of the two wildcard entrants who dashed nearly all of French hopes, Nick Kyrgios who beat Gasquet in 5 sets when on to beat Jiri Vesely who had beaten Beetlejuice. Kyrgios won in 4 sets 3-6 6-3 7-5 6-2 and through to this first Round of 16 in a major.

Yeah thanks for showing up now bye. I'm off to my 1st Round of 16 at a major

Yeah thanks for showing up now bye. I’m off to my 1st Round of 16 at a major

Isner aka Mountain Troll will play FeFe Lopez on Monday. Their match got suspended as did Stan the Man and Denis Istomin’s match. Kei Nishikori aka Horsikori and Simone Bolelli are 3-3 in the 5th set. They will continue on Monday. So I have been getting some feedback from a fanz. He stated that I should re-rename John Isner. We all know that he was called BFG, Big Friendly Giant but after he decided to be all “ignant” and stuff I said I should call him Mountain Troll. However, a fanz as I said made another suggest; Notorious B.I.G aka Notorious Big Ignorant Giant. It sounds cool and everything I think. So let me know what you think.

John Isner aka Mountain Troll or John Isner aka Notorious B.I.G?

Kiss the grass and Serena can kiss my ass

Kiss the grass and Serena can kiss my ass

No Laquanda do not come out! Let's keep it team Jesus today.

No Laquanda do not come out! Let’s keep it team Jesus today.

So Serena how do you feel about this lost?

So Serena how do you feel about this lost?

Mofo how do you think I feel? Gurl I gotta read you a bit...You know you're my good gurlfriend but I have to tell you, the weave looking ratchet. You have to fix this. No Bueno!!!

Mofo how do you think I feel? Gurl I gotta read you a bit…You know you’re my good gurlfriend but I have to tell you, the weave looking ratchet. You have to fix this. No Bueno!!!

So gurl what you doing later?

So gurl what you doing later?

Wanna come with me to meet up with him?

Wanna come with me to meet up with him?

Honey is his (gulp) really that big? YESSS GAWD!! I am coming

Honey is his (gulp) really that big? YESSS GAWD!! I am coming

I mean seriously this golden blazer is just everything right now!!! EVERYTHING

I mean seriously this golden blazer is just everything right now!!! EVERYTHING

No boo shit your ass down. You look like a clown.

No boo shit your ass down. You look like a clown.

I mean double scoops of chocoloate ...  the possibilities

I mean double scoops of chocoloate … the possibilities

Mofo, this face does not look like no fcuking Koolaide Jug

Mofo, this face does not look like no fcuking Koolaide Jug

Gurl you blind?

Gurl you blind?

Whatever mofo

Whatever mofo

We think we cute

We think we cute

#teamgay? or #teamgaynesia?

#teamgay? or #teamgaynesia?

Kei Nishikori is all hotness

Kei Nishikori is all hotness

Until he shows his teeth and he becomes Horsikori

Until he shows his teeth and he becomes Horsikori

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  1. I would love to have Tom Daley and Kei in the same bed as me.. Could eat those asses for days

    Oh and I prefer mountain troll actually. Isner looks, acts and sounds like a dumb redneck at times.. It’s fitting

    • I am gagging right now! And not the good kind. I am glad that it is your bed these two are in and not mine. No please. I might puke. Kei-Kei needs to fix those teeth. Not okay. He near the top 10, he got money. It can get done. However here at RealzTenisFanz, we do not speak of such things as “eating asses” That is far too crude for out taste. We prefer something more subtle like “tossing salad.” Far more discreet here.

    • I do like Mountain Troll and not because I came up with it but also because it is simple. However, I also like Notorious B.I.G (Big Ignorant Giant) because it is clever. I can combine the two “Notorious B.I.G Mountain Troll” ala Fivehead JungleWitch Jankovic.

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