Realz

2015 Australian Open: Day 4 The Late Later Edition

In Uncategorized on January 24, 2015 at 4:12 am

1fe7f54dcaeea6000785a983fe3ff916f63d5817f6e335e581f8f506da41943c

I am beginning to wonder if anyone really reads this blog. It might just be that the “supposed traffic” that I am getting is merely spam because I get a lot of Spam comments that I ultimately have to delete since there is no point in responding to internet bots. My eyes are heavy and carrying bags. I am foregoing sleep yet again to bring you a Realz Brand of Tennis Coverage that you can find nowhere else. Anyway, let us get on with the show. SO PLEASE FOLKS COMMENT AND LET’S GET A FOLLOWING!!

The Ladies 

grg6p

 

So it seems for better or worse, the ladies have got their lives together. They have settled down and played a better brand of tennis though several of the notable players are experiencing some hiccups. The Serenanator was up against Vera Zvonareva who has nearly fallen off the radar but there was a point in Vera’s career when she was the No.2 player in the world, a ranking that was legitimately earned. She made it to the finals of two majors (2010 Wimbledon and US Open) and was producing quality results at a few others (2011 Australian Open semifinals to name one). However, both mental and physical instabilities got the better of Vera. Now when I say mental instability, do not imagine like bipolar and/or schizophrenia, I am talking about the nagging doubts that have always plagued her throughout her career which more than likely intensified during her long absences due to injury.

Serena was getting outplayed by Vera and she didn't know who it was on the court

Serena was getting outplayed by Vera for a hot minute

However, I am digressing once again.  So ReRe was playing Vera and for a near full set, the Russian was digging into the American. She was relentless and forcing the issue. Her forehand was working and she earned herself 3 set points but they were all on Serena’s serve, which in and of itself was not such a bad thing at the time during the match. Serena was having issue with her ball toss and the second strike because of the sun. It was a serious problem. Anyway, so Vera had these 3 set points at 5-3 but in just the nick of time, Serenanator came back online and held for 4-5.

The sun is in my eyes!!!

The sun is in my eyes!!!

Vera to serve for the set! And therein laid the tale of the tape for this match. Vera could not get it done as Serena broke to level it at 5-5. What is even more accurate to say, Vera could not get anything else done for the match. Sometimes, in these big matches against these top players, they give you ONE SOLITARY look to wrest control of the match from them. If you fail to take that gift, they pounce and they rip into you like it was a grave insult to have dismissed their gift of a free rare win over them. They raise the level of their game so high that you are left more deflated than the Patriots footballs. (I hope I noted the right team). So Serenanator righted her life and Vera near lost hers. She did not win another game for the rest of the match as Serenanator was fully loaded and executing perfectly. Vera was gagging, Vera was missing and Vera was losing. Serena took the match 7-5 6-0, winning 10 straight games.

Sometimes Vera can play a giant's game but then she becomes a mental midget

Sometimes Vera can play a giant’s game but then she becomes a mental midget

So other winners: Well Granny Vee is playing well and getting through her matches with ease. She took out fellow American Lauren Davis 6-2 6-3. No struggling and no 3-setters thus far. We can only hope that she keeps this up because the matches are only going to get tougher and in this Melbourne heat, her Sjogren’s Syndrome would be trending. The sisters have also decided to pull out the Doubles Draw and for some journalists, this was of particular news. It did not help that when asked about why they pulled out, Venus responded by saying “According to the rules, you don’t have to give a reason. I think we’ll stick with that … No further questions on that. I object. Sustained. Thank you.” My main gurl Venus! It did not help that later when asked about the matter, Serena responded with, “I don’t think we have to give a reason … I think Venus answered that already.”

In other words

In other words

This gave the journalists a tittie attack because according to one of these said journalists, Carole Bouchard, “people are talking and saying there’s injury.” She added that she had to ask because that is her job. I quietly pointed out to her via Twitter that, she can ask but like the rules and Venus said, “You don’t need to know!” This turned into a “Twitter Tiff” where she quickly pulled rank and said that she is “sick of non-journalists” like myself who telling her what to do in her job. Gurrlll! She went there. She literally went for the jugular in a nano-second. However, I did not check her because you know, I am gonna let her have her shine for this rare moment because we all know I am right on this front. I mean how can there be a question of injury when they both moved so well in their singles matches on that day and won in straight sets. Doubles has not nor ever will be a priority for the Sisters at a major. Yes winning them is fun and great photo op but do you think it is a priority? If it were, we would see them playing week in and week out on the regular tour.

I am gonna just walk on by because Realz is handling these journos for me today!

I am gonna just walk on by because Realz is handling these journos for me today!

Furthermore, I have already won the battle. She engaged with me on Twitter. Plus I had already got in her face earlier last week about her “Gluten free diet” bit she posted on Twitter which scientists have now proven to be fad and a fake unless one has Celiac Disease. She does not have it. Djoker have these people running wild with this nonsense. Even he has shied away from this narrative.

53356064

I did however explain to Mlle. Bouchard (She’s French) that the Williams Sisters do not need to win another doubles title in their life. They have 13 majors including 4 at the Australian Open. Why bother with more when Venus has Sjogren’s and the heat in Melbourne is crazy. However, she was adamant that there was a story there. I pointed out that there was no story but merely two sentences. “The Williams Sisters pulled out of the Doubles Draw. They gave no reason” BOOM! What is an even more pressing story is the wellbeing of Vera Zvonareva because we know she is drowning herself in tears in the locker room as we tweet. She of course turned it into some “Journalistic Code” of going for the story and presenting information when people wish not to share and her “editor” not wanting that story. This for me is a really tricky issue.

You have insufficient funds for this discussion because you have ZERO sense

You have insufficient funds for this discussion because you have ZERO sense

Pardon the mini digression here. In the age of Social Media: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, SnapChat, Vine, etc etc and everybody and their grandmother having a camera and a “smartphone”, we have all become, sorry to say, dumb. We have lost our sense of privacy (pronounced prey-ve-cee not pry-va-cee I kid not that serious) and the need and importance of being private. Everything now is up for grabs to be in the limelight. I personally believe that cameras should be treated like stoves in people’s homes and apartment; everyone has one but not everyone is capable of using it to its fullest potential and thus they keep it simple and never publicize their meagre or mediocre results. Anyway, we now live in the world where journalism is all about “Click Bait”. Where the integrity of the article is underserved only to have many likes, re-tweets, shares and/or followers. I cannot tell you how often I am disappointed with the garbage passed off as news these days. The truth of the matter is that people really do not have a “right to know” everything. They clearly have the “right to ask” but not to know. People have been given far too many liberties when it comes to other people’s privacy and private matters.

Click-bait

In the matter of this journalist and the Williams Sisters’ Doubles Withdrawal, she is not interested in the facts but merely in sensational possibility that one or both could be injured because that would drive “internet traffic”. This whole idea of “people talking about it” and “she is doing her job to find out” are mere smoke screens. No one was talking but these journalists in their caves. If someone came out and said the sisters are injured, A) the sisters have a right to keep that information private and B) as the sisters are not talking, why not go to the “original source” of the story? She cannot because there is none. See they make up a story and discuss the possibility of it happening. “Never let the truth get in the way of a good story!” Or so they say. However, I would leave this matter here for now.

10727294_717863321642009_58020478_a

Back to the tennis: Granny Vee will play Camila Giorgi of Italy who took out her opponent, Tereza Smitkova 6-1 6-4. Winners of the day include Aga Bratzwanska (6) who is playing fine tennis dropping 1 game against Johanna Larsson 6-0 6-1. Kvitova (4) beat Mona Barthel 6-2 6-4. 2014 finalist, Dominika Cibuttkova took out Tsvetana Pironkova 6-2 6-0 (You know I have zero sympathy for Pironkova in this regard … gurl who knocked Granny Vee out of a major 3 times). Barbora Zahlavova-Strycova (25) and Elena Svitolina (26) who will face the Serenanator in the 3rd round both won their 2nd round matches. Another winner is Timea Bacsinszky who has been showing fine form in this earlier part of the year.

Kvitova is quietly making her way up the ladder to a possible 3rd major title

Kvitova is quietly making her way up the ladder to a possible 3rd major title

Both Garbine Muguruza (24) and Lordlize Cornemort (19) two players who knocked Serena out of majors last year, have also won their matches and through to the 3rd round. The American is on a projected collision course with Muguruza in the Round of 16 and Cornemort in the quarters if they all progress that far. Both Muguruza and Cornemort were mucking about in their matches as they were leading and then went on a bit of a mental holiday or perhaps in the case of Cornemort, had to hunt down a horcrux. Muguruza took out Daniela Hantuchova 6-1 1-6 6-0 as Cornemort won in 3 sets.

It was Cornemort's birthday! And who said the Dark Lord has no feelings?

It was Cornemort’s birthday! And who said the Dark Lord has no feelings?

Meanwhile, of particular interest to people who care, several American women not names Serena and/or Venus Williams are through to the 3rd round. Unknown Madison Brengle who had upset No.13 Andrea Petkovic in the 1st round, destroyed another American Irina Falconi 6-1 6-3. The much touted Madison Keys is also through to the 3rd round when she simply dismantled the game of Casey Dellacqua (29) after dropping the opening set. Keys had all the doors to Dellacqua’s game tightly locked up. Dellacqua could not buy a break point even if she had an 80% off special discount for one. Keys won 2-6 6-1 6-1.

Yes I had Dellacqua on lockdown because I got all the Keys

Yes I had Dellacqua on lockdown because I got all the Keys

Another Australian who got her life ended by an American was Sam Stosur (20) no surprise at all. Stosur, the last match of the day got handled by CoCo Vandeweghe 6-4 6-4. Australians who paid for tickets for Rod Laver Night Session went home feeling totally gutted as not only did Stosur lose but Lleyton Hewitt lost in 5 sets after being up 2-0 sets to Benjamin Becker. Aussies were pressed, bothered and deflated!

grhx2

I got caught up in so many different things that I almost forgot to mention the real Match Du Jour: Caro Wozniacki (8) v Vickie, the 2-time Champion here! Well there was a lot of build up to this match with Wozniacki seemingly getting closer to winning a major or so they say and Vickie coming back from injury and a very poor showing in 2014. She is now ranked in the 40’s hence why she is meeting the Danish Biscuit in the 2nd round of a major. Well from the start, Vickie was bossing the ball around the court. She is a great mover and counter puncher and she had that tennis ball going every which way particularly towards the Wozniacki feeble forehand. The Belarusian staked out claim to the baseline and repeatedly pinned Wozniacki in the back of the court to scramble to stay in the points. Vickie broke early and led 3-0 including the double break. Wozniacki was about to get it level at 4-4 but could not consolidate the break giving Vickie the chance to serve it out, which she did 6-4. In the 2nd set, it was more of the same but this time, Vickie was better than she was in the 1st set. Wozniacki realized that she either had the game or the gumption to get the momentum to shift her way. It became all too clear why it is that Vickie has two majors and Caro has none. Vickie took the match 6-4 6-2.

From one Serena pigeon to another, the better pigeon won!

From one Serena pigeon to another, the better pigeon won!

Let us get to the menz: So Djoker Harlequeen (1) took out Russian Andrey Kuznetsov in straight sets. Djoker was already up 6-0 6-1 when he decided to be a bit generous and give Kuznetsov a few games and even a break. However, it did not mean that Djoker was going to let it be Burger King; Kuznetsov was not going to have it his way at all. Djoker moved to the 3rd round 6-0 6-1 6-4. Defending champion Stanley (4) is also through to the 3rd round with a straight sets victory over Marius Copil. Stanley might also be nursing a bit of a wrist injury but we will see how that takes a toll on him this tournament.

What can I say, I was feeling very generous about letting him get a few games in. I am nice like that

What can I say, I was feeling very generous about letting him get a few games in. I am nice like that

As per the norm, several Spaniards are through to the 3rd round of a major: Fake Fire Ferrer (9), FeFe Lopez (12), Tabasco Verdasco (31) and Guillermo Garcia-Lopez all had relatively comfortable victories and will find themselves one step closer to making the 2nd week of a major. In the case of FeFe Lopez, he got lucky more so than comfortable. Frenchman Adrian Mannarino was leading him and even had match point. Lopez was able to force a 4th set to stay alive but Mannarino was in pain. The weather conditions got to him and he retired from the match.

Man down! Man down! Mannarino had fallen and could not get up

Man down! Man down! Mannarino had fallen and could not get up

Other winners include Kei Nishikori (5) was in a fight for his life against Ivan Dodig. I do not know why Kei with his fragile body and limited resources is out there slacking off with a scrub. This is the second match he is basically playing like a Monfils on court. Anyway Dodig looked near serious about the upset win and was putting Horsikori through the paces. Dodig served for the 4th set but got unlucky with the definitely pro-Kei crowd. Kei took it 4-6 7-5 6-2 7-6. I have to say that for me Kei is a special player. There is something magnificent about his game though not his teeth but we are not here for that. It is quite easy to see why he is a likeable character on the tour. He still needs to fix those teeth though.

Is Realz saying nice things about me? Wonders never cease!

Is Realz saying nice things about me? Wonders never cease!

In my mind I imagine he is like Mario of Super Mario Bros. fame. First he starts off looking diminutive then as though he ate that super mushroom, he turns into a giant on the court seemingly everywhere. Finally, there are moments when Kei is on the “Star Power” juice when he is virtually unstoppable and he is creating winners out of nowhere and everything thrown at him, he crushes. He is capable of turning it on in the key moments of big matches. Conversely, like Mario, he is capable of simply languishing about and is quite fragile. Star Power juice is only temporary and the ability to get it is few and far between. The slightest of offensive blows landed on Mario, he is back to being regular Mario or dead. Kei needs to maintain his high level of play and manage his matches far better than he is doing now if he wants to win a major.

new-super-mario-brothers-giant-mario

Anyway, Raonic (8) also won his 2nd round match as did his fellow Canadian Vasek Pospisil aka Popsicle. Their next door neighbour, the Americans, John Isner (19) aka Mountain Troll BFG and Steve Johnson are also through to the 3rd round.

By way of “upsets” Roberto Bautista-Agut (13) lost to Gilles Muller and Santiago Giraldo (30), he lost to the American Johnson. I guess the “biggest shocker” of the day was Gael Monfils (17) aka Beetlejuice being sent packing by Jerzy Janowicz in 5 sets. Like I said, the reason why Monfils does not win major or more to be precise, he does not really factor into the mix is because he wastes so much time on court in the earlier round and then eventually it catches up with him. Janowicz should not have won this match but Monfils donated it to him, 6-4 1-6 6-7 6-3 6-3. I need not mention again how Hewitt was up 6-2 6-1 on Benjamin Becker who is most famous for beating Agassi in his last professional match at the US Open, and got his wig snatched in the next three. Becker won the match 2-6 1-6 6-3 6-4 6-2. Aussies were not having it and nor was Bec. She was mad as hell.

Bec Hewitt

Bec Hewitt

Bec Hewitt

Bec Hewitt

Bec Hewitt

Bec Hewitt

Anyway, that is enough of that.

The Mixed Bag Picture Show

FeFe Lopez is too hot even for himself

FeFe Lopez is too hot even for himself

Raonic is a cutie. He's definitely the guy that you can take home to your mama. #husbandmaterial

Raonic is a cutie. He’s definitely the guy that you can take home to your mama. #husbandmaterial

#flawless is Thanasi Kokkinaskis

#flawless is Thanasi Kokkinaskis

Someone pour water on me because I am about to lose control

Someone pour water on me because I am about to lose control

Gurl don't be pinching my butt in public. You know what that does to me

Gurl don’t be pinching my butt in public. You know what that does to me

Meanwhile, let's take a look at this #foulfashion. She's wearing a lace jacket? WTF

Meanwhile, let’s take a look at this #foulfashion. She’s wearing a lace jacket? WTF

And mint green floral print?

And mint green floral print?

Meanwhile, this guy swore he wore it better and I am inclined to agree with him

Meanwhile, this guy swore he wore it better and I am inclined to agree with him

That time when your BIC highlighter went into the washer with your PE clothes

That time when your BIC highlighter went into the washer with your PE clothes

The reason that racquet is there is for viewer's discretion. Her pants are so short and tight you can see lips!

The reason that racquet is there is for viewer’s discretion. Her pants are so short and tight you can see lips! In fact they are not short shorts but in fact panty briefs

CoCo is giving you the "I just slayed Sam Stosur Stance"

CoCo is giving you the “I just slayed Sam Stosur Stance”

Meanwhile, Vickie is doing only God's knows #fixitjesus

Meanwhile, Vickie is doing only God’s knows #fixitjesus

You get ZERO street creds for this! I mean with the mouth taped shut, you are practically holding a dead crocodile

You get ZERO street creds for this! I mean with the mouth taped shut, you are practically holding a dead crocodile

I am not so sure whether Rod Laver is being fitted for a suit

I am not so sure whether Rod Laver is being fitted for a suit

Or being done up by a mortician. He looks so dead that he could be bored

Or being done up by a mortician. He looks so dead that he could be bored

How Aussie Fans Reacted to Hewitt and Sam’s Loss

The look you get when your players are playing shit

The look they got when Sam and Lleyton started playing shit

You're near losing your voice but have strength for profanity laden sentences

They began losing their voices from chanting but had strength for profanity laden sentences

And it is too late to get back your money and your poor wife is about to get a beating because of it

And they realized it was too late to get their money back and the wife is about to call 999 because the husband is having a silent heart attack

Advertisements
  1. Hey I am upset you do not use my suggested nickname for John Isner – Notorious BIG (big ignorant giant). I thought we agreed after Isner’s comments about the Redskins football team that he is more ignorant than friendly.

    • Thank I near forgot all about that. I was trying to remember that but it slipped my mind. Hence why I was using Mountain Troll BFG. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to use Notorious BIG since it is related to a huge rap star but I think I will use it nonetheless.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: