Realz

Realz Fashion Review: WTA Pre-Wimbledon 2015 Party

In Wimbledon on June 29, 2015 at 1:19 am

I love me some Wimbledon because it is the time of year when the female athletes attempt to dress up and be ladies. Now do not misunderstand me, I am not implying any gender distortion for the women. No, I am just saying that the ladies of WTA always try to be “girly girls” and it ALWAYS give us spectacular results!!! And you know that Realz is here to bring you all the photos with the realz deal. I think most of the ladies would benefit greatly from a gay in their life because their fashion sense is no where near as being en par with their tennis ability at all. 

I cannot believe this but JJ is BEST DRESSED She captures everything right here! Youthful, sexy, maturity, form, fit, hair, makeup, shoes AND no purse because she's so fucking hot, she's not buying any drinks tonight! Drinks will be bought for her!! A+++

I cannot believe this but JJ is BEST DRESSED She captures everything right here! Youthful, sexy, maturity, form, fit, hair, makeup, shoes AND no purse because she’s so fucking hot, she’s not buying any drinks tonight! Drinks will be bought for her!! A+++

This was the mess she wore last year! Such an amazing improvement this year!!

This was the mess she wore last year looking like a Serbian vampire! Such an amazing improvement this year!!

Heather Watson - Grade A: Colour, style work well for her. The hair en pointe and the shoes as well. Slight critique is that the sock tan line and the dress a tad bit too short. However that's me kit picking.

Heather Watson – Grade A: Colour, style work well for her. The hair en pointe and the shoes as well. Slight critique is that the sock tan line and the dress a tad bit too short. However that’s me kit picking.

Genie - Grade: B- I am being very generous here because this dress is TOO LONG and not form fitting enough. What is worse is that Genie swears she is killing it. However, that dress is killing her.

Genie – Grade: B- I am being very generous here because this dress is TOO LONG and not form fitting enough. What is worse is that Genie swears she is killing it. However, that dress is killing her.

Look at it from the back, it is too big for her. It is not draped properly at all

Look at it from the back, it is too big for her. It is not draped properly at all and it makes her look emaciated. 

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I should be thankful she didn’t wear something like this mess again

Ajla and Hana Tomljanovic is doing it well. They get a solid B+ for the double act

Ajla and Hana Tomljanovic is doing it well. They get a solid B+ for the double act

Ajla by herself is killing and well deserve an A-

Ajla by herself is killing and well deserve an A-

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Bringing sexy back …. a lil back makeup/spray tan would have been great though but she’s giving me attitude (NO to the lipstick though)

Angie is really trying to be youthful here but this outfit would look better on an older lady. HOWEVER, she is working all the elements and gets an A-

Angie is really trying to be youthful here but this outfit would look better on an older lady. HOWEVER, she is working all the elements and gets an A-

Now I have a lot to say about Anastasia Pavyluchenkova in this outfit and much it might not be so nice BUT Ana Pav has improved over last year's effort and heeded my advice from last year because I went IN!! So she get's a Solid B! The hair and shoes are en pointe!

Now I have a lot to say about Anastasia Pavyluchenkova in this outfit and much it might not be so nice BUT Ana Pav has improved over last year’s effort and heeded my advice from last year because I went IN!! So she get’s a Solid B! The hair and is en pointe! Gurl  I think those shoes a tad bit small for you. Your toes sweeping the carpet

This is Ana Pav from last year 2014! She was begging for me to unleash the kracken to come her in this hot mess.

This is Ana Pav from last year 2014! She was begging for me to unleash the kracken to come her in this hot mess. I couldn’t even give this one a grade it was just a mess

Lucie Safarova .... Unfortunately the internet cannot see the look of utter disappointment I am giving you right now...

Lucie Safarova …. Unfortunately the internet cannot see the look of utter disappointment I am giving you right now… Those shoes are HORRID and we spoke at length about that lipstick not being for you …But because of the dress you get a B-

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Karolina Pliskova … I give her an E for Effort but she looks like she borrowed a friend’s clothing. The shoes look cute. I am gonna need you to do better

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This is just utterly unacceptable from Serena! You got money and you sell clothing. This shit is just BASIC!!! This looks like something one of the poorer girls would wear to play a tournament. I wouldn’t have mind so much if she had jazz it up with a belt or something but this is SO BORING despite the shoes. Serena I give you an S for Salvation Army because that is where you got this dress. #GurlBye!!

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Carla! Carla! Carla! I guess I should be happy that Carla put into some major effort or more rightly so, someone else put in a lot of effort for her BUT the stockings and kitten heels are just LOW CLASS! She looks like she’s going to Sunday church service and this party was held on a Thursday! NO!! Gurl this ain’t cute at all. Grade C+ for the wonderful dress and hair. I cannot overlook below the knees

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Madison I want you to take this dress and lock it up and through away the keys. A little voice in your head didn’t say NO gurl this is a mess? This would have been so hot if all this black sheer fabric wasn’t on the dress. If you’re going to go sexy go sexy.  You cannot be bi-polar about it. This dress is giving me hot and cold at the same time and therefore you get a C-

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That’s right Urszula, you cannot wow us with your tennis on court so you wow us off court. I get you with that but gurl your feet look like they are in torturous pain. I  really want to dislike the dress as I think it is basic and you could have done better but I have to respect your attempt and give you a B- for you do look good if we are not watching your feet. 

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Simona I wanted to hate this dress but I remember some of your previous efforts so I am happy you stepped up your game but kept it modest just the same. So I going to give you an A- because everything looks nice and tight. However, let me just say spray tan for those feet. Not cute at all 

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Simona’s previous efforts looking like childish

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It is like when Victoria got dressed this night, she thought, “How can I piss off Realz?” Who the hell is her stylist, Helen Keller? This shit is ATROCIOUS!! The only positive I can draw form this is that her hair looks clean and her toes pedicured. Everything else is just horrid. A huge F!!!! Them shoes?? Arghhhh #Icant

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Christina McHale, this is a definite McFail! You look like someone’s mother and how dare you go out with them feet. You don’t even get points for effort because you did not even try here at all. No. You get a Grade G for #GirlBye

Vitalia Diatchenko

Vitalia Diatchenko … I am not feeling the hair looking like the Cowardly Lion from the Wizard of Oz. However, the dress is a nice fit. I am not feeling them shoes though. I’ll give her a B.

Maria

I don’t understand why these rich girls are looking like they shopping at the thrift shops. However, Maria is going a step further. At the French Open, she gave us sailor with the blue and white stripes and keeping this nautical theme going she gives us “Sharapova Sells Seashells by the Seashore!” It is as though one of Ariel’s sisters came ashore for the party. I cannot hate on the them shoes though! They are magnificent. Grade C- for that dress. She can do better!

Zheng Saisai

Zheng Saisai, I want to like this outfit but somehow those white gym socks with the black kitten heel shoes is just too much for me. I am gonna have to give this a D for just being Dumb

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Zarina Diyas is looking very nice in this dress and the hair looks good too. However, those shoes look like throwaways. No bueno!! She gets a B-

Garbine

Those exciting shoes do not go with this very boring red dress and that lipstick again is not for you. The whole ensemble looks like something for a much older woman. You get a C- for this

Sabine

Sabine is posing and working it all. However, I am not feeling this hair but Sabine has that look us … I am about to get TURNED UP!!!

Laura

Laura Robson was stepped her game up! This might seem a tad bit mature for her but she wears it well. The hair and the shoes are EN POINTE. The red dress is stylish and flattering. Meanwhile, not sure what that woman in the background is wearing … those shoes are killing me.

Ana

Ana isn’t carrying a purse this evening … She brought her man. The only lady at the event I think who brought a date … and check out the rock

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Ana gets a solid A!! I am not in love with the shoe style though the colour is right and the mid section of this dress not so flattering … but the hair and make up and her confidence definitely ROCK

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Apparently Petra thought it was appropriate to wear her man’s T-shirt to this event. Those shoes … this is not even worthy of a grade because it is just unacceptable

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I am so disappointed with Daniela right now. Usually she is en pointe but her make up is bad and she’s wearing the hotel’s drapes thinking she looks cute. She look a hot mess as though she was playing dress up with lil kids. She gets a G Grade for Ghastly Garbage. I cannot believe she made my list as my #3

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Kurumi Nara looking like she got lost on her way to the office. Went out on a Starbucks coffee run and stumbled across this event. Gurl you get a B for ByeGurl!!

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  1. I love your blog! HAHA huge tennis fan right here 🙂

    • Thank you so much!! I really appreciate the love and “hate” if I warrant some 🙂 I hope you’re tuning into the podcast and enjoying it!!! Don’t forget to tell all your friends about it 🙂

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