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From the Archives: Mr. Federer gets “married”

In Archives, Roger Federer on April 13, 2009 at 3:09 am

Please note that this is a posting that was originally written in March/April 2009. Though the information is dated, I hope it is nonetheless enjoyable. I have decided to repost as many of old issues online as possible. Please read and enjoy. DISCLAIMER: All photos in this posting, are taken from the internet.

After years of forestalling, Roger Federer has decided to make an honest woman out of Merka…(I really should get her name right) All right her name is actually Mirka Vavrinec.  Yes people they got married on Saturday in a private ceremony (no witnesses) in Switzerland (can’t get any neutral than that).

NO. This is not a recent picture of the mother-to-be. This is early 2008. I guess black used to be slimming.

There is so much to say about this little charade. When I first heard about it I thought of the old adage “If you got nothing nice to say, do not say anything at all.” But my mama always say, “Speak the truth and shame the devil!” So I am going to shame the devil and keep the 5th Commandment. Now, we here at RealzTennisFanz Newsletter have long discussed Federer being a part of the “family” (I have to be straight lace here because of potential lawsuit but do note that all puns are intended) I would like to think that we are well aware of the real deal when it comes to this matter. However, as Mr. Federer (one has to be formal in these proceeding) has decided to take his little farce one step further in attempt to discredit the editor, publisher, creative director, copier-internet-photos photographer and reputation of this worthy periodical, I thought it best that we, and rightly so, openly deal with this matter. Fans do not be dismayed, we here at RTF Newsletter are not in the closet and will be coming straight at you.

Now, quite recently, Mr. Federer announced to the world that Ms. Vavrinec, now Mrs. Federer was pregnant. Mr. Federer and Ms. Vavrinec met at the 2000 Sydney Olympics and have been an “item” since then. Ms. Vavrinec originally from Slovakia was a tennis player. Yes, fans, she used to run up and down a tennis court. Yeah, I know hard to believe that she once was able to run anywhere besides the lunch counter (Rrrrrrr) However, we have exclusive picture of her in those glory days.

Mrs. Federer in her hay day

Well anyway, Mr. and Mrs. Federer have been inseparable since then. Mrs. Federer gave up her career for him. Truth be told, Mrs. Federer did not have much for a career. Her best effort was number 76 in 2001. If you ever checked the WTA rankings, outside of the top 32, it is anyone’s game. All you have to do is win a couple of rounds in any tournament to be in the top 100. Anyway, Mrs. Federer was introduced to the game at age nine by no less than Martina Navratilova. Yes, the one and only lady-man to be on the WTA. No disrespect to Martina, she is a legend but here at RTF we likes to keptz it realz. So Ms. Vavrinec then, became Mr. Federer’s manager. Seriously? Seriously? I may not know much about this subject “intimately” but how many men outside “the family” would allow their girlfriends to run their financials? Anyho…she became his manager and they were all over the place, including fashion shows of the world.

Yeah! There is the “happy” couple at Oscar de la Renta.

You would think that after all these fashion shows, someone would help Mrs. Federer look a bit more “put together.” But I guess its hard work living with the “DIVA” that is Mr. Federer. How many men outside of the “family” are into handbags and bags? In 2007, when Mr. Federer was finally able to beat Rafael Nadal (aka the one who broke Feliciano Lopez’s heart) on clay in Hamburg, Germany, 6-0 in the final set no less, do you know how Mr. Federer decided to show his enthusiasm to his then supposed girlfriend Ms. Vavrinec? He kissed her on the cheek a la Parisian style. Yes, he did! I am sorry, I am not one for PDA, but I would NEVER kiss my boo on the cheek after such a monumental victory over a rival. One does get emotional at times like these and forget their “parts and lines” and act out of character.

Mr. Federer had announced earlier that he would forgo playing at the first Master’s clay court event this year, Monte Carlo. I mean seriously, he has made it to the finals I believe three years in a row only to be whipped by Rafa in the finals. Who could blame him? I mean it is not like it was going to help his chances at the French. I guess he was trying to change things up a little. Every time he made it to the finals there, he made it to the finals in Paris only to lose to Rafa. So don’t play the event, maybe I would win. Anyho…he made the decision to be out. He was going to the next stop Rome, Italy where he, like the spaghetti is straight until you cook them. However, come Thursday, he asked for a wild card to the Monte Carlo Masters, got it, got married on Saturday in Switzerland and now on his way Monday to Monte Carlo to play tennis. What about the honeymoon? You work on your honeymoon? That is not how I would treat my boo that I just wed. But then again, he already allegedly knocked her up, what more is there for him to do? Hmmmmm.

As for Ms. Vavrinec, her side of the story is even more intriguing. She gave up her career for him and stood by him for 8 years without marriage giving away her milk her free whilst gaining weight like a cow. Doing everything for Mr. Federer and never complained. I mean some women have patience but at the rate she was going, it should have been St. Mirka at this point, if not for her patience but for her undying devotion as a beard and a hag. She went so far as to allow him to work on their honeymoon. Honey please!! We know the dealio here at RTF Newsletter okay. I do hope that Mrs. Federer is handsomely rewarded for all your effort. I can bet that the ring is going to be “simple and understated” as if Mr. Federer does anything simple and understated when it comes to material garbs.

Look at the “happy” couple!!

In closing, I would like to say, I know I am often labeled a hater, but I sincerely wish this couple all the best. Mr. and Mrs. Federer are free to do what they must do. I am not going to stand in their way. However, I would like to say that when I look at this couple, I do see other great celebrity couples, so there might be something to it. Of course not like Humphrey Bogart and Lauren Bacall, Ruby Dee and Ozzie Davis, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, Will Smith and Jada Pinkett, Antonio Banderas and Melanie Griffith. More like, Michael Jackson and Lisa-Marie Presley, David Gest and Liza Minelli, Star Jones and Reynolds and McMillan and Wife. So, I wish the happy couple all the best because they would need it. I am not bitter about the marriage, I just know better. I would admit I have no problem being a step-father but I do draw the line at taking care of someone’s else baby when the child is neither mine nor my boo unless of course I am adopting.

Mr. Federer definitely knows that diamonds are a girl's best friends

PS. Mr. Federer, as you are no longer listening to my advice, I would offer this final piece to you in hopes that you might follow. Marriage and baby has never helped the career of any tennis player. None of the top players have ever married at this point in their career. They get hot babes or boys to sit in the box and be pretty. Nothing more and nothing less! Ask Hewitt if you do not believe me. Ask Pete Sampras? Ask Agassi? I hope you prove me wrong but I am only predicting one more major for you my former boo. However, but truth be told, I cannot say that there has been much if any precedence for players who marry their hag and the effect on their ensuing career. I hope your little experiment work more so in your favor than in mine because we here at RTF Newsletter would love to report on some good news about Roger Federer on the actual tennis court.

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Archives: US Open 2008, Day 2

In Archives, US Open on August 27, 2008 at 12:12 pm

The US Open is now in its third day. No real major upsets to speak of thus far. Richard (pronounce Reshard) (He is French) Gasquet lost to Tommy Haas. Richard was seeded 12th or 10th I think and Tommy was unseeded. However, Tommy aka “Head and Shoulders as he doesn’t have any neck, was a former number 3 ranked player in the world. He has had bad luck but nonetheless is a quality player. The Frenchman is often inconsistent whereas the German Haas can be a very dangerous player to have in your section of the draw.

Last night, I saw Venus Williams and Roger Federer. They both looked pretty sharp. However, Roger was a bit off at times and not as on point as I usually like him to be. He got the job done though. 6-3, 6-0, 6-3. His opponent, the unheard of Maximo Gonzalez was a quality player. However, a 5’9” stature in today’s tennis world is not going to win major battles. Thus the Argentine was looking at an early exit with a prize of $18,500. How is that for a 1h 25 min job? If I could be so lucky.

Other wins included Serena, Karlovic, Del Potro, Dinara Safina (one to watch on the Women’s draw). Andy Roddick is playing his first round match today as well as Novak Djokovic. So look out for updates throughout the day.

As promised here are the pics..

Looking like an Easter Peep

Lindsay looking like a lady. Motherhood has done wonders for Ms. Davenport

Who knew Monica Seles could be so HOT??

Trivia of the day!! Who is Coco and who is Kiki?

Donald Young: USTA hoping would be their next big star

UPS man Roger Federer...I wonder if he makes home delivery. You can ring my bell..ell...ell You can ring my bell...(70's hit song)

Roger on opening night. Man this guy got great clothes.

Can't even walk in Roger's shadow. Sloppy Andy

Archives: US Open 2008, Day 1

In Archives, Grand Slam, Rafael Nadal, Roger Federer, US Open on August 26, 2008 at 10:42 am

So the last major of the year has started. I am sorry for the delay in sending out my newsletter but I just came back from a two week hiatus. Yeah I was out doing (I wish I were in Beijing) Olympics coverage. It is great being away from this place. I would highly recommend it to all. However, coming back is never great. I have been trying to get stuff done. Anyway to the Open.

So they are trying to make this Open as big as possible. However, the Olympics Games have definitely outshined any major sporting event this year and since Roger cannot get to Major #15 in NYC, the US Open will be relegated to just being another tennis tournament. Many of the players are coming off the jet lag of China. So don’t be entirely surprised by upsets.

So far things have been pretty routine. Nadal however, faced a tough fight from the German Bjorn Phau I think is his name 7-6, 6-3, 7-6. James Blake was tested by the young Donald Young. Blake finally won the fifth set 6-4. Although Young may never be able to contest for major titles perhaps at the French Open, he is one to watch. He has deft hands at net. He is refreshing to watch. It’s a shame he is small in stature and a throwback to the ole school days of tennis dexterity.

Anyway before this match, there was a celebration of 40 years of the Open. They brought in past champions and of course Roger was there looking all precious. I swear that man’s closet has treasure chests. I reiterate my statement from last year again this year, “I wanna raid Roger’s closet and not the gay one.” FYI Roger finally won gold at the Olympics and then he was jumping all on top of Warwinka. (pics in next post) It was disgusting and exhilarating at the same time. Roger is finally coming out of the closet if he is trying to hump his country man on camera. It was a bit like soft porn.

No major upsets to report thus far other than Chatvetadze lost her first round match. She cried and cried hard. Jelana Jankovic who beat American Coco looked like those Easter marshmallow treats, Peeps wrapped in silver. She looked bad. Other wins thus far are David Ferrer, Del Potro who has been on fire this year, Monfils, Murray are all through. America lost the huge tall guy John Isner. Dementieva, Davenport and Danish Wozniacki also won first round matches,

This evening Venus Williams take on Sam Stosur and Roger Federer some qualifier.

Archives: Wimbledon 2008, Day 5

In Archives, Maria Sharapova, Wimbledon on June 27, 2008 at 11:27 pm

Top of the morning to you. So, the rains are finally here in Jolly ole England. For the first time in 5 days rain has cometh at the All England Club, a very unusual feat. Not the rain, the fact that it has been five days without rain. I am sure many players wish there was rain earlier as they would have loved a much cleaner start. When I left home, all courts were covered and no big names were playing save Vaidasova and Kuznetsova. Oh yeah Chatzedave (sp) too. Rog was set to play at Centre Court but is awaiting the end of the showers. Serena is set to play Amelie later on.

Nevertheless, there is much to talk about from yesterday’s play. WOW. Thus far on the men’s side the 3, 4 and 6 seeds are out. The lone American on the men’s side is Bobby Reynolds. There is not much I can say for him other than he is in the third round of Wimbledon. There is much to be done for the Americans both on the women’s and men’s. The Williams sisters are the lone voice for American tennis. They are on the Olympic team along with Blake. Andy opted not to play citing he wants to be prepared for the US Open. Brother go play in China cause your style of preparing has not been doing much for you at all. Perhaps a change might do you good. Andy plays a lot better for the US under Davis Cup than elsewhere. I am baffled by his decision. But then again, aren’t we always baffled by Andy. I must say, that since he left Reebok for Lacoste, things have not been going so hot for him. Every major since then, he has been defeated in a most embarrassing fashion. HE NEEDS A NEW GAME PLAN.

In the press conference, he stated that he choked. I agree, however, this is tennis, best of five sets. You are not supposed to choke. This is not figure skating, gymnastics, diving or one of those one hit/shot sports. There is no clock in tennis. Andy had ample time to adjust his game. As much as I am not a fan, I don’t know, I like the guy in a way and I would love to see him do well. Not beat Roger of course, but still. There is potential there. I think he needs to go seek out the Dahli Lama or something. Go on a spiritual quest. Kabala perhaps. I am sure he can call up Madonna or something. Tina Turner for some Buddha. Even perhaps a little Jesus cause Andy at times on the court, looks like you need a hug and a prayer.

Anyway, Alla Kudryavtseva beat Maria Sharapova and isn’t she a little cocky one. She was like I knew I could win. I came out there to win. Get this, she added “I didn’t like her outfit so, I wanted to beat her” Can you believe this little one? Big talk. She is a bit too cocky. However, she beat Maria. Alla K however, has forgotten that the upset of a big name player is no indication of that player going on to greatest. Many top players have lost to unknowns, and usually those unknowns remain unknowns. Alla K, you also perhaps may need to speak with someone about the serious acne problem on your face. Proactiv perhaps. You got the money for it. You are in the third round of Wimbledon. So fix your face. Being cocky and ugly is not a good combination.

Archives: Wimbledon 2008, Day 3

In Archives, Serena Williams, Uncategorized, Wimbledon on June 25, 2008 at 5:35 pm

This may be one of the most interesting Wimbledons ever.

As of today, both the number 3 and 4 seeds on the men’s side are out. That’s right in just two days both Novak Djokovic (who was slated to be placed in the finals overcoming the Roger Express) was taken out or should I say snuff by the big man from Russia, Marat Safin 6-4, 7-6, 6-2. I watched the earlier part of that match this morning and I knew that Novak was not ready for Rog in any shape or form. Apparently he was not even ready for Marat. Marat now has a 2-0 head to head over Novak as he took him out also at the 2005 Aussie Open en route to the title. I know the Serbian has loads of fans but I am not one of them. He is a good player but I detest his sportsmanship during matches as well as off the court.

Of course Brad Gilbert and the host of other cacklers of ESPN had Novak on top of a pedestal but as per the usual, they were made to look like idiots.

Davydenko the 4th seed went out in straight sets.

Nicole V. She had a tough match as she lost 9 straight games. Vaidosva can perhaps blame her recent bad form to dating Radek Stephanek aka Shark Boy. His last ex girlfriend, Martina Hingis dropped in the rankings and also got caught with cocaine. So, girl, cut your loses and dump the ugly boy.

Elena D. advanced. Hopefully her serves hold together as she has some monster ground strokes.

Serena leads the first set 2-1

Bartoli, last year’s finalist won the first set

Gonzalez lost his match (?). The 2007 Aussie Open finalist is currently suffering from the Aussie Open finalist syndrome. Get to the finals and then drop off after that. Let’s count the victims, Thomas Johansson, Marat Safin, Rainer Schuttler, Tsonga.

Oh how I wish I were home watching the matches. FYI If you have Verizon as an internet provider, you can see the matches on replay at ESPN 360 as well Euro 2008 matches. You can see the full matches. Unfortunately for me I have Cablevision which does not allow access to the website.

Archives: Wimbledon 2008, Day 1

In Archives, Rafael Nadal, Roger Federer, Serena Williams, Venus Williams, Wimbledon on June 23, 2008 at 5:23 pm
The All England Lawn Tennis and Croquet Club would be having their annual major tennis event aka Wimbledon starting today. For those who are unaware, grass is the playing surface and Roger Federer is the man to beat. There is much talk about how he is vulnerable but we shall see. I left him at home, having already won the first set against Hrbaty. Serena was playing but apparently Mary Jo Fernandez thought it best that I watch Kevin Kim play instead. Nevertheless here are the updates thus far.
Roger won the first set.
Juan Carlos Ferrero was up on Sam Querry the 6’6″ American
Marcos Bagdatis was leading I forgot who he was playing
I believe the American Spadea was tie with the Swede Johansson
Nicole Vaidasova was already in the second round.
Serena is playing but I am not sure about the score other than it was 1 game all.  I would try to get to my connections to update on the results.
The story of the tournament is will Roger get to number 13 and a 6 consecutive Wimbledon. Brad Gilbert has predicted a Novak vs. Nadal finals with Andy Roddick being the spoiler.
As for the women, the draw is interesting with the Williams sisters, the most dominant grass court players of this tennis generation on opposite side of the draw as well as the Serbs. The crown is for the taking, who wants it bad enough will win. I don’t see nothing but spectacular tennis to take the ladies’ title.
Send all questions and comments. They are all appreciated.
PS. There will be no Roger Federer bashing. There is a zero tolerance for that sort of behavior.

Archives: Australian Open 2008, Day 11

In Archives, Australian Opn, Grand Slam, Uncategorized on January 24, 2008 at 3:17 pm

Well the draws are down to the wire and the tennis has only got better and better.

First the women’s semi-finals: Maria vs. Jelena.

Maria started out blazing with a 5-love lead in the first set and was serving for the set at 5-1. However, Jankovic broke serve and held to make it 5-3. Maria served out the set 6-3. The score however, does not tell the true tale of the tape. Maria was serving horribly. Her first serve percentage was hovering around 40% throughout the set. It seemed that she was choking but Jelena helped clear up matters by placing the balls so short in the court that Maria was teeing off as if she were playing golf.  Jelena of course tried to hold up play by calling the trainer. Maria was not doing anything special but being very very aggressive on the return game. The second set proved to be much the same. Maria was in the finals for a second straight year. 6-3, 6-2 I think. I cannot remember what the final set score was exactly.

Daniela vs. Ana:

Whatever Venus had yesterday when she played Ana Ivanovic, it perhaps was contagious because Ana was as flat as 2 week old soda. Homegirl lost 8 straight games. Daniela was on the money. I have never seen Daniela play so well. She looked healthy and was hitting the corners, right on the challenges. She was in the ZONE. However, there is an expression I have used here before which states “Those with an injured foot always take an early lead.” Daniela would lose the match in three. This much be very disappointing for Daniela. She has put in a lot of work. It was very weird to her the commentators call her “veteran” at 24. Anyway, I really hope she takes the positives of this match and put it for the rest of the year.

So the finals are set, Ana vs. Maria. The two “hottest” girls on tour. Just like I said yesterday I believe, the BATTLE OF THE DIVAS. Though truth be told they are all trying to catch up to the standards set by Ana Kournikova and Serena. It should be an interesting match. I think Ana may pull the upset because Maria chokes whenever she is the favorite though I doubt she would want to miss this opportunity to redeem last year’s trashing. I have to admit that she had picked up a few game plays that are commendable. Maria that is. Hopefully Ana can save me from the onslaught of the Maria fans.

The men’s semi-finals was played yesterday or at least one of them. Jo-Wilfred Tsonga vs. Rafael Nadal. I have to admit I did not watch a single ball struck as I needed to sleep. However, imagine my surprise when I check the Aussie Open website and there was Baby Ali in jubilation having just beaten Nadal in straight sets. 6-2, 6-3, 6-3. This of course keeps the trend of a surprise finalist in the Aussie Open. However, this is an upset of great magnitude. Nadal was finding his own on this court. He quietly crept up the draw amidst all other upsets, Nadal kept his cool. Andy Roddick, his only possible threat could not get past the 3rd Round. According to the reports, Tsonga was all over the court and all over Nadal. He broke the Spaniard in his first service game. I am impressed with Tsonga. I saw him beat Murray and thought, WOW homeboy is going places as he kept his cool having lost a set 0-6. He is definitely holding up his end of the bargain and proving himself to be the only one of the new French generation that can contend for majors. I am extremely happy for him.

The other semi-finals which is going to be a mammoth of a semi-final is a repeat of last year US Open final. Federer vs. Djokovic. Everyone knows that I am behind Federer no matter what and know that this is not going to be easy for him at all. However, I know Federer loves a challenge and despite him being tested throughout the tournament he knows how to get the job done. He would certainly not want to miss the opportunity to pick up Major #13 as he wants this Golden Slam more than anything.  Djokovic has not lost a set throughout this tournament but he is one of those players whose gamesmanship can come into question as he pulls having “an asthma attack” whenever he is down in a match. So, hopefully tonight’s match would be very interesting and Roger comes out on top.

(c) 2008 CRH

Archives: Australian Open 2008, Day 5

In Archives, Uncategorized on January 18, 2008 at 1:47 am

Originally released on January 18, 2008

I am overflowing with excitement. The final match of the day has just been completed but I am withholding the result of that one for later.

Yesterday was a good tennis day. The seeds all held form. Maria though tested in the earlier part of the match broke her country woman Vesnina’s (or something like that) serve down. 6-3, 6-0. This Vesnina has game but as always experience is a powerful weapon on the tennis court. Justine won though Schaivone from Italy gave a fight for her money. Jelena Jankovic won as well and no surprise she won in three sets. Serena put on a service clinic as she was hitting the service box all over the place. She had 15/16 all out aces and plus her usual service winners that were unreturnable. 6-3 6-3/4. She went on to play doubles with Venus and they beat the number 2 ranked doubles team. The Olympic selection committee is going to be very interesting. However, I think Venus and Serena should stick to singles and let Lisa Raymond and other noted “doubles specialist” take that stop. I mean after all, they are not bad singles players. Right? But I digress.

Rafael nadal was tested early by the French man Gilles Simon. That boy played his heart out in the first set. However, against Nadal you have to keep him down when you have him down. Never let him back up cause Nadal can box his way out of a corner. Experience again played the decisive factor in this match as Nadal was able to rebuff the early charge by the Frenchman and maintain the Spanish pride. I must say that Nadal will never favor well on hard courts in a major or the Aussie open. The ball does not move around the court and as effective as it does on the clay court. His game is tailor made for the clay with the occasional success on hard-court. The ball sits up well for players to throw him off guard. I give him two more rounds. Well no wait….I don’t want to get ahead of myself. But let me say at this point that life has become easier for Rafa Nadal. I forgot to mention that Sam Querry won an epic match yesterday.

For those who read first article, they would have noted that I referred to Andy Roddick as a bully as he always beat up the smaller fries but is reckoned with in later rounds. Well I was right. Andy Roddick is out in the 3rd Round. So is Mardy Fish but that is consolation. I watched the match this morning at least the first three sets. I was contemplating not coming to work as I had monster of a stomach ache. So I waited it out watching tennis. Anyway let me say that this lost was coming because his camp brother John Roddick and Jimmy Connors had worried faces on even when Andy won points. Something I have noticed with the players on the ATP or more specifically the American men, is that from their box you can know whether they are going to win a match. Andy was classic Andy. Serve and big forehand. It was so predictable and Philip Korhlschieber (I got this spelling down) scouted and he played. Andy had his chances but when your game is built so heavily on one stroke you know there is hell to pay when it breaks down even by the slightest. They played 5 sets 6-4, 6-7, 7-6, 6-7, 8-6. There are no tie breaks in the final sets of all the majors save US Open.

The German is 5’10” that is short in tennis and he was on Andy’s serve like white on rice. Andy had his moments. I mean he bombed the boy when he could. However, whenever Mr. Korhlschieber got a piece of it, it was a whole different ball game. I say this and I say this again. The Roddick camp NEED TO TEACH ANDY SOME REAL GAME TACTICS. The boy is totally deficient in that department and players can see it. Half way through points I am at home predicting a winner for the German solely based on the fact that I am looking at Andy going the wrong way all in his ball placement.

There is only James as the lone American and perhaps Querry. Again, note, I hear American commentators complain about how women get paid too much money and men are better players etc etc. I think the American sports pundits should leave that talk for the International community because time and time again, it is the AMERICAN WOMEN who are saving the face of American tennis.

This weekend should be fun. The matches are going to be HOT. Venus vs. Sania Mirza, Roger, James, Novak, Tune into ESPN. I would give updates on Tuesday. I think by then the quarterfinals would be set and ready for action. I have to say that this Aussie Open I am seeing EXCEPTIONAL TENNIS. Everyone came with their game face. So I would say that who wins the Aussie Open are destined for great things this year if all remains well and healthy.

(c) 2008 CRH

Archives: Australian Open 2008 Day 4

In Archives, Uncategorized on January 17, 2008 at 1:35 am

Originally released on January 17, 2008

Well there is not much to talk about today seeing the fact that College Basketball was dominating the TV waves whilst the matches worth seeing were being played. So, I missed a lot but I can report to you what happened nonetheless.

Roger easily dispatched of Fabrice Santoro. I believe that Fabrice was under the impression that Roger was going to play along with him as have sometimes been the case in the past. However, Roger was not having none of that; 6-1, 6-2, 6-0. Roger is looking very impression. A closer look at the match would reveal that he is liable to have certain service yips but he kept cool under pressure won games nonetheless. I am not sure who he is up against next but it should be another easy breezy beautiful match for the Federer Express.

Venus Williams was a hot hot mess yesterday in her singles match against Camille Pin of France. Yes she won in straight sets 7-5, 6-4. However, she was making errors as if it were the objective of the game. But it is Venus we are talking about and in her most recent major win, she twice almost got bounced from the tournament. Aussie Open and Wimbledon suits the Williams’s game very well. She needs to realize that and play the game she is capable of.

Ivanovic looked very impressive in her match. Hewitt is still around and he is getting all pumped up. There were no major upsets. However, the match that was awaited was the Bagdatis vs. Safin match. I personally had no real vested interest in the outcome here though I am a Safin fan and always back him save when he plays Roger. Plus Marcos Bagdatis irks me at times with his on court antics and his loud Greek fans. (FYI one of them got maced in the face by an Aussie officer. The Aussie bobby just maced that guy full in the face about 5-6 feet away if so much. That guy is sure to have some damage to this eyes but I digress) Also, it was not a match worth me waiting up for as I could have predicted the outcome.

As was pointed out in yesterday’s letter Marat Safin is one of the most talented tennis player ever. The Russian oozes talent but the problem is between his ears. The match started out pretty much as how I scripted it in my mind (of course I watched the match) the first two sets to Marcos, Safin looks like a hot mess on the court, he gets pissed off. He wants to kill someone. He throws his racquet. He wins the next two sets and then fizzle out like alka seltzer and lose the final set. 4-6 4-6 6-2, 6-3, 2/3-6. Yeah the Russian lost to the Cypriot in 5. Surprisingly they both had never lost a 5 set but Marat never won a match if he lost the first two sets so history proved to be the victor here.

In other news, Venus and Serena in an attempt to make the US Olympic team in doubles won their first match today 7-5 6-1 and Venus was wearing a skirt. Thank heaven. Featured matches today would be Nadal, Andy, Serena, Justine, Maria and Jelena.

In other other news and this should really be the breaking news of the day. I would like to close today’s letter with someone who is/was very much a part of the Aussie Open. I am not a fan so you know I am saying this with the strictest of professionalism. Martina Hingis is a three time champion and 5-time finalist at the Australian Open. When other majors don’t go well, the Aussie Open has always been a safe haven for the Swiss Miss. This 5 time major champion’s reputation has recently been tarnished amidst allegation that she tested positive for cocaine. (Cocaine is a hell of a drug) The tribunal has met and confirmed that she did in fact test positive and she is banned for two years. I believe the tribunal and the test were right. Hingis has maintained that she does not know how the drugs got into her system. I believe her too. Now you wonder how this is possible. Well I would tell you why. Hingis has been until recently engaged to Radek Stephanek aka Sharkboy. I am not one to call random people ugly but believe you me, Radek’s face is the stuff that inspire horror/demons/monster movies. The boy’s face has no redeeming quality. However, he is now dating Nicole Vaidasova. Nicole Vaidasova. Yes people true true true. Can you believe that? I mean Hingis is no real beauty but she is all right but for someone like Radek Stephanek to move up from Martina to Nicole….NO NO NO NO. Something is not right. Radek is definitely drugging these girls to lure them into his lair. I hope a more thorough investigation takes place for this matter because a champion’s reputation is at stake here.

(c) 2008 CRH

Archives: Australian Open 2008 Day 2-3

In Archives on January 16, 2008 at 12:41 am

Original Post date: January 16, 2008 (Australian Open 2008)

Yesterday was touted as a being a great day for on the women’s draw as the place was all a buzzed with the match up of Lindsay Davenport vs. Maria Sharapova. Mind you Lindsay has only beaten Maria once in their 5 meeting (it was more than a beating as the score 6-0, 6-0 suggests that it was a massacre.)

So the pundits were all excited, Pam Shiver, Mary Carillo and Mary Joe Fernandez (ESPN commentators). Oh it is so wonderful that a mother came back on tour etc etc etc. Lindsay vs. Maria. Of course they forgot the fact that Lindsay does not have a winning record against Maria. However, Maria did not forget and she came out like a banshee beating Lindsay for all the fanfare 6-1 6-3. “How quietly we go out in the night.” We have to acknowledge the tremendous effort and strength Lindsay went through to get in shape but her performance was lackluster at best. Not known for her movement, (rumour has it that her 7 month old baby out runs her in a sprint) Maria placed balls in the corners knowing that Lindsay was not going to move. I am only happy that Lindsay went out because Mary, Pam and Mary Joe make me violently ill. They always go all stupid on certain players, Lindsay being a mother now they are all excited as she has joined their club. Of course there are really jealous as Lindsay has more tennis talent in her finger than the three combine. They are all “doubles specialist” and were all lifted to greatest in doubles by FAR MORE SUPERIOR partners. However, my happiness was short lived by the fact that they are all Maria fans and they go stupid over her as well.

In other news, Andy Roddick looked his usual first-week of-major-self. Dominating on serve, hyping himself up and running around giving you that fool’s sense of hope that he can really threaten at the majors. Mind you his opponents are lower ranks runts who we quickly forget the next day. Yet, like a bully in the school yard, Andy takes pleasure in beating up the small fry. However, the true test of his abilities always come when the sharks arrive and the Andy that we find so “precious” with his one theme song ‘Serve it hard then a forehand” shows up. He is not going to be the Aussie Champion 2008.

Rafa Nadal was impressive as always. Running up and down the court working every point over as if his life depended on it. Justine and Amelia. Amelia as always is an Anomaly. (She is here by christened Anomaly Mauresmo) Capable of great play and then running around the court as if she is not aware that she is a top 20 player. She is currently ranked 18. That is an insult. Serena was impressive but I felt she was giving too much too early. Her Chinese opponent (Look out for China come Olympics 2008) was in some places giving her a run for her money but Serena showed her who was the boss. I must say that Serena and Venus thus far have been showing a level of game play/tactic that I find very interesting and eagerly await when they meet the big name players. However, as we all know the Williams sisters though great, are more than capable of temporary insanity on court as Venus  first round in 2006 Aussie Open lost to Pironvoka (who is she? where is she?) and Serena three straight times to Henin 2007.

Thus far there have been no major upsets so all is quite well with the tennis world. Look for Safin vs. Marcos Baghdatis. Marat has the most talent on the ATP tour, his biggest problem however is between his ears. That should be an interesting matchup if the real Marat shows up. Federer of course plays tonight against Fabrice Santoro. Fabrice is a tricky player however for the tricks/magic he supposedly has, his ranking is a disappearing act. Novak and so does Venus play tonight. I know I am forgetting some players. I know it takes a lot of commitment to stay up and watch tennis. However, the matches are very good if you can withstand the bullshit that is passed off as commentary, then it would be all right.

(c) 2008 CRH